Split

I’ve been intrigued by some of the fallout over gay divorces lately. I surmised as we reached for equality many would brush aside or not even realize what that equal footing really meant. Now we see the down side of it, in other words divorce.

Many rushed forward to say those wonderful two words w/o truly considering what it meant. Sadly, some are discovering the unpleasant down side now. Gone are the days of DPs that can be dissolved with a simple signature on the dotted line. Welcome to the bitter brawls over assets and custody of children and pets. You no longer have the luxury of just splitting up and going opposite directions anymore. And I won’t even comment on the indignant outrage many have expressed over it. Welcome to true equality. It’s called community property because that’s how the divorce court sees it. okuuur?

And don’t get me wrong, I support our right to get married 100%. That will never change. Being equal under the law is a fundamental right. The fact we are still fighting for it in many states is an embarrassment to humanity. But now that we are finally obtaining that goal, we must take stock in what that truly means. We cannot be special but equal, only equal.

I’ve always been a big believer in levels of commitment in the legal form. And I think this is true of straight couples as well. Start out with a DP which bestows next of kin rights to your partner w/o necessarily committing to communal assets/debt. This gives you both time to test the waters to see if this is for the long haul. Then when you really think it will survive, go for the full enchilada of Marriage. To me, that would make total sense but I am not sure that will happen.

I think what will happen is you will see many cities and states do away completely with DP registries. We, like straights, will have two options, single or married. California so far hasn’t done anything. Living in SF, I currently have three options. City DP, State DP, or Marriage. The city DP gives you insurance and next of kin rights but requires no communal property. The State DP gives you pretty much the rights of marriage including communal property. The State DP also gave you joint filing on your State income taxes. Now that Marriage is legal once again in Cali, there may be no real need for the State DP anymore. The only difference I could see is if you didn’t want federal recognition, then it would be of benefit.

There has been some talk at the City level of doing away with the local DP registry. It hasn’t come to fruition yet but it would not surprise me. I hope that they don’t though. I hope they keep them separate to continue to give people a choice. Like many things in life, it doesn’t have to be all or nothing.

Regardless of whatever your options are in your city, town, or state, take the time to really think things thru. Do a little googling and educate yourself. Gay or straight, asking for a pre-nup doesn’t mean your love or commitment is any less real. It does mean that you are taking a precaution in case things don’t end with a happy ever after. Fairy tales were meant to inspire not to delude. Being in love is a wonderful feeling [1]don’t I know it!, but don’t let it overwhelm your decision making skills. And for the record, you can dissolve a pre-nup at anytime you wish. You can even build a time-limit clause into it.

And to answer your burning question, no the Pup and I are not at that stage yet. I certainly hope the day will come but we aren’t there yet. He pretty much owns me anyway but that’s a whole other type of contract. hehehe

References

References
↑1 don’t I know it!

In

You knew it was coming…another post about the Pup! lol  Yeah, I’m gonna gush a little again.

Lately, more than a couple friends have referred to me as being “all-in” with the new Pup. They’ve commented on how happy I seem, how very eager I am, and also how much more open I am in public/social forums about my feelings. And they are right, I have been. I’ve been very expressive on and offline about how I feel. On the flip side, I have personally been a little worried of overwhelming him with all my expression. [1]Yes darlings, I can be overbearing and/or intense at times. I know, color you surprised!

I have been asking myself why exactly that is. Part of me is just very expressive and it is natural for me to show it. On top of that, blogging has taught me to be introspective and has sharpened my ability to articulate my feelings and emotions more eloquently. Then you mix in something so fundamentally new to me and you’re bound to see me express it. But is that all? Is that the only reasons? I’m not so sure.

In less than two shorts weeks, my beloved Pup will be here with me full time. Yeah, you read it hoes, full time! lolol He’s making the move to SF and I couldn’t be happier. So yeah, I express it a lot, to him and the world. In 7 short months, he has shown me what being in love with the right man for the right reasons can feel like. Some could consider that kind of fast and maybe it is. But having such a deep yet oddly simple connection, I don’t feel a need to be overly cautious. It feels more right than any LTR I’ve ever been in.

Having learned my lessons from previous LTRs, I think I might be overly sensitive about him moving here. I’ve gone out of my way to make sure he has a safety net. God forbid, if something were to happen he has his home in Phoenix to go back to. He originally wanted to sell it and I was very against that. I also insisted he have a transfer or job in place before he moved. Having been thru it before, I can tell you the financial stress can be disastrous for a budding LTR. A move is stressful enough w/o adding a job search into the mix. And don’t get me wrong, these weren’t all my ideas. We discussed and agreed to them together. The point is having learned from past mistakes and loving him so much, I’d never want him to fell trapped, stuck, or resentful.

On top of that, for the first time in my life, I feel like I’m in love with the right man at the right time for the right reasons. I have zero doubt. Zero. I have yet to ignore or push away a reg flag. That is certainly something I’ve never really been able to say to myself before.  We exist as our imperfect selves and we both seem to just resonate with the other. We are not perfect but I like to think we are perfect for each other. And this is not to turn it into something mythical or put it on a pedestal. I fully admit I am not perfect. I make mistakes and I’m sure he and I will have strife at some point. I am only describing the differences between previous relationships and this one.

And while I do not fear for our relationship, if for some unknown reason it didn’t work out, I would not have a single regret. I’m not settling. I’m not accepting behaviors thinking I can ‘handle them’ because I understand the motivations behind it. I am not pushing for the LTR out of loneliness. I am, for lack of a better description, wholly in love with a man whom loves me back just the same. I am truly grateful that for whatever reason he saw in me what he needed and wanted and went for it, even when I was on the brink of ending it all. [2]A story for another day but would have been the biggest mistake of my life. There is no way I could regret what I have with him, ever.

And even as I gush away here on my blog, I know that he is ok with it. He often tells me he doesn’t feel as expressive as I am. (Which makes him normal! lol) But when he does express himself, it is perfect (for me). He manages to convey so much in much fewer words than I. Maybe I should take a que from him? …Shut it! :p lol Ok seriously, he has assured me I have yet to make him feel overwhelmed, pressured, rushed, or even daunted.

So yeah, I’m all in on this one. I”m not holding anything back. No doubt, no regrets, no compromises on what I need or want. Does that make the potential for hurt that much greater? Sure it does. But the reward is so much more and absolutely worth it IMHO. And I’d be an idiot to let fear ruin the most wonderful thing in my life.

References

References
↑1 Yes darlings, I can be overbearing and/or intense at times. I know, color you surprised!
↑2 A story for another day but would have been the biggest mistake of my life.

Home

Living in SF, I tend to be somewhat spoiled in many ways and am often reminded of that anytime I travel. SF is much more open, expressive, and accepting in many ways, including gays. It is referred to as a bubble for many reasons. During my recent trip to Nashville, I was reminded how very different said cultures can be. That is not to say one is bad or good. Nor is it to say one is necessary better than the other. They are just different. Some may appreciate comforts here not found elsewhere and vice-versa.

I bring it all up today as the trip sort of solidified my feelings about SF being my home. I was only gone a few days but I was truly homesick. It was the oddest thing. I was very happy to see my brother and my new nephew but I could not wait to get home. On the plane ride home I was anxious for the BART ride back into SF. I was very surprised at my reaction. I’ve been bemoaning the lack of any time outside of SF for a while now. With everything going on I haven’t had a real vacation away in several years. Yet, here I am only gone for 4 days and I couldn’t wait to get home!

I’ve always felt at home in SF but have often wondered if I have been limiting myself by saying I’d never move from here. I no longer think so. While I could leave, it would take some serious motivation. I love living in SF. The environment, attitudes, etc all mesh well with me. It has it’s problems and it certainly has things that drive me nuts but at the end of the day, I find it harder and harder to find other places in the US I’d rather live. I guess what I’m saying is I’m learning to appreciate my life in SF more. It was very much a whim and an interest that brought me here. And while I think I’ve appreciated it before, I don’t think I’ve ever realized what that appreciation brings me.

I planned the upcoming November cruise out of a strong desire to get out of SF. I am still looking forward to it but I no longer feel like I have to get away. I like the comforts of home and am realizing I have a lot of what I need in my life right here. If I’m being honest, with the Pup moving up soon, I’m beginning to feel truly blessed. Not in the religious sense but more just very grateful for the wonderful things I have. It hit me recently that I have almost all of the things I’ve ever wanted in my life. And while my life is far from perfect, it is truly a remarkable feeling to realize what I have. It’s funny, I spent so much of my life lamenting for better days, realizing they are here seems almost anti-climatic. Part of me likes to think I deserve it and it’s my time after a life-time of a lot of heartache and struggle. Part of me is on the other side and doesn’t think that universe deals in rewards for good behavior and I’m just lucky. lol Maybe it is a little bit of both.

In the end, I keep thinking about balance. I want to believe that my life is balancing out the bad with the good. Yes, I recognize much of my fortunes now come from more than a decade of personal growth. I could not have had the relationship I have now 10 years ago. I simply was not capable of it. I have worked very hard to be the type of man I can be proud of. And while I recognize there are no guaranteesin life, I can still appreciate reaping some reward for my hard work. I can appreciate, regardless of the reasons, how good I truly have it. I sincerely hope everyone can experience it, at least once in their own life.

Trip

Moe, Bro, and his hoe….

Yet another non-Pup related post. Aren’t you proud of me?! lolol

Anyway, I am on a work trip to Nashville, TN as we speak. lol  This means I am missing part of GHHD #3 in SF. [1]Folsom St Fair I could have gotten out of the trip but my younger brother lives here in TN and drove over to meet me. I was also hoping to meet one of my long time fave bloggers and buddies, Large Tony. Sadly, timing wasn’t on our side. He had to work and I had a conference to attend. As for my brother, I haven’t seen him in almost 5 years. Since work is paying for the trip, I’m killing two birds with one stone. I also have comp tickets to the Grand Ole Opry but I’ll likely skip that. *yawn* My brother wants to go but it’s already sold out and I can’t ‘reassign’ him my ticket.

I’m staying at the Gaylord Hotel/Resort, which is freaking massive! This place covers 9 acres of land and has over 2000 rooms! The shuttle driver said they have just over 4000 employees. That’s bigger than some small cities. Lolol They have sectioned the place off into regions almost like states. lol Everything for your room is coded to your region. It is not uncommon to see people just wandering in a daze, lost and confused as to where to go. [2]Remind me to discuss the details of my rather loooong flight and my cranky arrival.  It’s gorgeous and incredibly scenic but honestly way more than I’d ever do on my own. The rooms aren’t cheap and honestly, I’d forego the wonderful scenery for a larger onsite gym and a pool that was open past 10pm. The room is incredibly generic. IMHO it’s just overkill to sell this place. It takes 15 minutes to walk from one end to the other, no exaggeration. I’m not complaining just expressing a POV. I’m sure some that come here would absolutely love every minute of it. It can be a little breath-taking for the scenery.

The trip itself deals with the project I’m currently working on. The vendor that develops our software puts on a big conference every so often to solicit interest/feedback for it’s product(s). Agencies/vendors can see it for the first time and/or provide feedback on problems or needed features. It’s basically a PR campaign but it will be nice to talk with other agencies that use the software. The vendor comped my agency this year since we are currently going thru an upgrade. Originally, it was supposed to be me and two other co-workers but both of them decided not to go so I’m solo. I like it because I can multi-task  between my brother and the conference and not feel like I’m abandoning my coworkers. lol

My brother got married a couple years ago and his 2nd son was born just two short weeks ago. It has been wonderful to see my brother and meet my new nephew! He’s took a couple days off from work and crashing in the hotel with me. An extra guest doesn’t cost anything so it all works out. hehehe I almost cried when I saw him. Even though he always seems to have reverted further into redneck territory every time I see him, I love him all the same. lol We were always the closest growing up and I have truly missed him.

I’m coming back to SF tomorrow, Saturday. I really miss home. It’s funny because I’ve been so looking forward to my cruise in November yet I get a trip away for a few days and I’m lonesome for home. Lord, I think I’m turning into a homebody. That or I’m just totally spoiled from living in SF. So many friends of friends are in town (that I want to meet) so it seems I’m definitely doing the fair on Sunday. I was rather wishy-washy at first but now I can’t miss the opportunity. The Pup isn’t coming up for Folsom. Considering he’ll be here permanently in just under 30 days, it didn’t make sense to try to squeeze another trip in. Lawd knows I miss him something fierce but sometimes I ‘gots’ to use the head vs the heart to make decisions. I seem to find ways to love him more every day and I don’t even know how. He seems to just appreciate and accept all of me. I often find I’m just overwhelmed from feeling so accepted.

Oh hell, I’ve diverged into gushing over him again. Ok, time to end this rant and head for my next seminar. I’m ‘be dun learned’ about GIS mapping configurations, VPN socket hardware/software systems, enhanced data image layering, sms/mms upcoming emergency protocols, blah blah blah. Today’s seminars actually deal with some of the meat and potatoes of the work I’m currently doing so can’t miss it.

References

References
↑1 Folsom St Fair
↑2 Remind me to discuss the details of my rather loooong flight and my cranky arrival.

Burn

People always seem surprised that I don’t go to Burning Man. I’m not sure exactly why that would come as a surprise but ok.

Having read their official site, FAQ, and supporting links, I just don’t see the point. I’m not bashing it, I just don’t get it. Not getting it doesn’t make me against it in any way either. [1]I’ve gotten hate mail in the past for daring to discuss a different POV. lol  My only real disagreement is their assertion of “radical self-reliance.” I don’t call packing everything you need to survive for 8 days radical. I call it being prepared. Living in a desert open space isn’t conducive to self-reliance on the environment. Maybe it’s a minor point but it feels slightly disingenuous to me. I wonder if growing up actually relying on the environment to provide for me has jaded me a bit. My idea of radical self reliance involves living off the environment with little to no assistance from the outside world. Pumping in electricity, water, food, sanitation facilities, and Internet is not self-reliance IMO. lol

Anyway, I appreciate a lot of the artistic effort that goes into the event. Some of the displays and constructs are truly a site to behold. Many of the costumes and over the top displays can be equally artistic and beautiful. Is it enough to interest me in camping out? Not really. The reason I mention it is because I’ve begun to hear grumblings from many about how the event is changing. Like anything new and exciting, it is bound to grow and evolve over time. The question is can it survive the increase in size and still maintain the integrity of its roots? Ironically, said issue is discussed on its official site.

Much of the feedback I’ve heard this year has been very 50/50. Some swear it is a life-changing event and revel in the freedom of it. Others complain of feeling ostracized and the very clique-ish feel that is developing. I can’t speak for either side, but have noticed a very distinct shift in the feedback. Time will tell if it will become a victim of its own success.

As for me, I’m not for or against, it just doesn’t appeal to me. From the positive side, I hear a lot about the spiritual connection it invokes. Having found my spiritual center, I struggle to see a need here. My meditation and readings feed my spirituality and I don’t feel it’s lacking. So this aspect doesn’t appeal to me.

Then there is the living off the grid and/or self reliance. Well, I practically lived off the grid most of my childhood. Beyond having electricity, we had no phone or cable. The internet didn’t exist yet. Our water was from a well we drilled. We hunted, fished, and/or grew 90% of our food. Several of my younger years included living with an out – house vs indoor plumbing. My closest neighbor was 3 miles in either direction. The closest emergency room was 50 miles away. I guess this might have spoiled this aspect of the event for me. lol

The artistic expression is probably the single thing that interests me. Being the only interest, it is not compelling enough to make me endure the hardships and fork over $400 for said experience. The latter only meant as a declaration, not a negative vote.

So there you have it. If you’re an attendee, first-timer or OG, feel free to share your experiences.

References

References
↑1 I’ve gotten hate mail in the past for daring to discuss a different POV. lol

Stuff

I had a caller tell me the other day she couldn’t be bothered to worry about tying up an emergency line because “that stuff doesn’t effect me.” Well true, at least until you do need someone and then the line is tied up by some other very inconsiderate person who can’t be bothered. Karma can sometimes be a painful teacher. I hope she never finds out first hand. But the flat out indifference surprised me a bit. ‘Screw you because I can’t be bothered to care about my actions but I’ll be the first to scream when it happens to me,‘ seems to be the norm vs the exception these days. While the result of your actions may not always be readily quantifiable, it should matter that your behavior impacts others. Otherwise, we devolve into a race of adults w/the minds of self-obsessed teenagers. Think on that for a bit.  /rant

Another caller didn’t believe he’d reached the real police dept and kept hanging up. He’d then call back to try and get someone who sounded more official. He got me and apparently thought I was official enough to report his noise complaint to.

The best call was a guy reporting a 311 (naked person) in the wharf who kept going on and on about how unattractive the naked person was. I mean he really went on about it. Couldn’t be bothered so much that he was naked but that he was unattractive and naked. lol At least he was honest about it.

*

The project I’m assigned to is still ongoing. What was supposed to be roughly 6 months has turned into a year, or it will have by the time the assignment is over. I don’t mind but many of the delays, most unnecessary politics, have sucked some of the fun out of it for me. I still get to influence how it will function and look and as a user that will be the biggest benefit. I could go on and on over the drama but it’s not worth it. In the end, it’s gone from being exciting and fun to just a paycheck. [1]Ok, the geek in me still likes it but the zeal is gone.  lol I don’t think I’d be cut out for civil service in the higher echelons. I’d get too disenfranchised I think.

Speaking of, more and more of my coworkers, as they discover the breadth of work I’ve created, are saying I’m in the wrong position or I should try to wrangle another job out of this. I am really appreciative that they recognize not only the level of skill but also the amount of work I’ve put into this thing. That said, I really enjoy my job. Primarily because it matters in a very real way. My actions have direct consequences on people’s lives and I value that. While it is true I don’t use all of my available skills, I use plenty and I’m content in that. And it is projects like this that give me a chance to show off my less used abilities. I guess in the end I would consider other options if they were available but it would have to be pretty good for me to jump ship, so to speak.

References

References
↑1 Ok, the geek in me still likes it but the zeal is gone.

Connect

Oh look! Another post not Pup related! lolol

As technology becomes more pervasive, the ever present choice of connecting with my family on social networks keeps coming up. Up until now, it hasn’t really been much of an issue as most of the direct family I do assoicate with is not at all computer friendly. My youngest brother and I are the closest and he is and has been pretty much my only link to the rest of them. He asked me the other day if I was on FB. I guess in speaking with some of the cousins, they expressed an interest in connecting with me. I didn’t reply at the time but I’ve been pondering it ever since.

Growing up the way I did, I’ve been very disconnected from most of my extended family. When I did know them, it was rough and they knew it. They didn’t care a whit enough about me back then to intervene or offer up help so why do I need them now? Nor did they ever make an effort to reach out to me anytime since then. Now that social media has made it basically one-click access to my life, suddenly they’ve found an interest. I am struggling to find any value in that. Of course, my younger brother, being closer to many of them, sort of creates an unavoidable bridge. But is it a bridge I care to connect to?

To be clear, there is nothing in my life to hide. Just the opposite, I live openly and honestly. But at 42 years old I also have zero desire to hear the scandals, stories, and whispers about my life and/or actions. Ultimately, the question is do I feel a stronge enough connection to my extended family to weather said drama?

I don’t have an answer yet as I haven’t made up my mind.

Heard

It can be interesting hearing people have said things about you that have the tiniest kernel of truth or no truth at all. And unlike brettcajun, I don’t fly into fits of rage or hand-wringing as a result. :p There was a time when it would have gotten to me but not anymore. In the last few months I’ve heard a few gems I felt like sharing. And I will remark on how odd it seems they all happened within the span of a few months. lol Is there a horoscope entry there somewhere?

“He has an 11-inch penis.” And I shit you not, this not the first time someone has said that! While I’m certainly happy with my size, I ain’t no 11 inches! Back when Apple guy and I were together, a mutual friend apparently had me mixed up with someone else and while casually having a conversation with Apple guy, felt compelled to blurt out we’d had sex and he really liked my 11 inch penis. Needless to say, Apple guy set him straight on the subject. I was flattered but what the hell does one do with a monster like that? I mean the only persons who could handle it would probably already be a bit road-worn, if you catch my meaning. lol Hearing it again recently I can’t help but wonder if it comes from the same person? Regardless, I’m not even flattered it’s just bizarre.

“He has a habit of moving guys to SF and then dumping them.” Twisted truth that no longer resembles the truth is no longer truth. It is true all of the my last three significant relationships involved a man that lived elsewhere. That I moved them here and then dumped them would be categorically untrue. Not even close. lol The Pup and I laughed it off. He knows the truth and that is all that would ever matter to me.Even if he were concerned, he would have had the integrity to come and ask me directly.

“He’s only into white guys.” Nope. While I do find white guys more in my range, my attractions run the gambit. I’ve had many flavors over the years.

Perception can be a funny thing but one should also interject reason and logic at some point.

Fear

As far as I’ve come, I still battle with insecurities from time to time. Such is life as we all struggle with our demons. Ironically, it is something I’ve never really felt before.

Having struggled practically since birth, I unfortunately get a little suspicious when things seem to really be going my way. lol Yeah, that sounds a little jaded but I never said I wasn’t. Anyway, I keep worrying that something will happen with The Pup and it will all abruptly end. *sigh* I know it’s stupid but there it is. That’s why I said it was irrational. lol  Yes, it could be conditioning from previous trauma. Yes, it could just be my own insecurities. I get all that. But knowing it doesn’t just make it go away. But fear not dear reader. [1]See what I did there? LOL  I have found something that does in fact make it “go away.”

As previously mentioned, to know beyond a doubt that he feels like I do is an incredibly powerful feeling. I won’t lie it overwhelms me at times. [2]I’m a big ole softy inside and my emotions do get the better of me at times. It gives me a sense of comfort and contentment I’ve never felt. I’m also finding it gives me an added sense of confidence. Having never had that feeling, I think it is natural to become possessive and protective of said feeling. lol I never want it to end. I want it to last for the rest of my life. Again, this is an avenue where fear sneaks in; fear of losing that feeling.

I dare say I deserve to be happy. I’ve paid my dues and then some in life. I must have been awful in one of my previous lives because the payback in this one has been major!  But life isn’t about fair and even. While I like to think the universe is about balance, an every day life doesn’t always balance out. I need to remember that just because I had an awful start doesn’t guarantee a happy ending. I wish it weren’t true but it is. And so here again a fear can sneak in.

I refuse to let all these little fears rule me. They might have in the past but not anymore. I can be prey to them but not a victim. Life isn’t about fair, it is about living to the fullest and having enough wisdom to take advantage of any opportunities that come along. That’s how I see my new relationship with The Pup. It is an opportunity for me to make myself (and hopefully him) happy. I plan to pursue that opportunity as long as it exists. If that means the rest of my life, I’m ready. Game, set, MATCH!

I love you Pup. And given the opportunity, I’ll spend the rest of my life with you.

References

References
↑1 See what I did there? LOL
↑2 I’m a big ole softy inside and my emotions do get the better of me at times.

Russia

I rarely discuss current events here as one, not really what my blog is about and two, successful discourse these days seems to be all but impossible. Having had several discussions with friends and even a few blog readers asking my thoughts on it, I thought I’d weigh in.

First, there is no clean answer. It is a sticky convoluted problem. Every answer put forward so far hurts someone. So if you look at the least amount of harm caused vs potential success then you can sort of see a way forward.

The boycott of companies. I don’t support a boycott. Primarily, because it won’t do any good. Put – head doesn’t care about the fallout or damage he causes, he only cares about furthering an agenda. He doesn’t care if we boycott one company or all of them, he will continue his agenda unabated. This is Russia we’re talking about. It’s history speaks for itself. Frankly, I don’t see that we do all that much business with Russian companies to begin with. I’m sure we have some but as a consumer I just don’t see it. I also don’t believe that they have any influence at all over their government. They don’t have the lobbyists like we do here. They don’t have the buying power like greedy corps here. The vodka company has been a decent supporter of gay rights before and after this incident. Why is it fair to punish them when they have zero influence over their government? Plus, boycotts are becoming so common as to be pointless and ineffective IMO. Even if they make further strides to support us, I still don’t support our methodology. The end does not justify the means if we give up the ethical/moral high ground. I don’t see the extra media attention as justification either. Said attention could have been garnered in other ways.

Boycotting the Olympics. Why, so the Russian athletes can take home all the medals? No thanks. Many of these athletes work their whole lives for this. To deny them that would be just a wrong as what is being done to us. How does wronging others do us any benefit? If anything, I think it would create more animosity towards the LGBT community.

Moving the Olympics. I would support a measure if there were time. From a very pragmatic approach, there isn’t and they wouldn’t even consider it. It takes years to plan and prepare for said event. As much as I’d love it if they were willing to move it, it’s not gonna happen. Too many ripple effects for a cause that is not near and dear to their hearts. If it were an option, this would be the one to go with. It would embarrass Russia and Put – head in a major way. Sadly, I just don’t see it as a real option.

Banning Russia from the Olympics. While still causing harm to their athletes, it would send a very powerful message to the government. While I still don’t like the idea of denying athletes, many of whom are probably gay, it is the least damaging of the previous options. Sadly, I’m not even sure that would work. Put – head has some pretty hard line policies and I can’t honestly believe he’d change his mind.

Pressuring sponsors. This is probably the least likely to cause harm but also least effective. I’d support the effort but I’m having a hard time finding a positive net result.

I would push other countries into a united front against Russia. Then if they didn’t budge the IOC could resort to banning Russia from attending. To me this seems to be the most effective way to make a positive change before the Olympics. Granted, any athletes that get arrested for ‘propaganda’ would set off world wide repercussions. While I’d never wish that on anyone, I’d support any athlete who did it! And sadly, I am worried it is the only really effective way to make a difference over there. *sigh*