I discovered recently someone I know personally has unfriended and even blocked me on FB. We weren’t close friends but I can’t ever remember having a falling out of any sort. Granted, I didn’t even notice said person had unfriended me for quite some time. The only recollection I have is that he and I often had slightly different political views. We disagreed a few times but it was never mean or rude. He would get rather upset with anyone who didn’t agree with him. I’m left to assume he got mad because I disagreed on something and blocked me. Oh well. He was clearly missed. /sarcasm
This last week I noticed I’ve also been unfriended a few times by folks who didn’t agree with my views on current events. It seems to be a growing theme on social media. Basically, people don’t want debate, they only want supporting comments or views that reinforce their own. Then they get super upset or bent out of shape if someone disagrees with them. If you don’t want comments from people who might disagree, either don’t allow comments or don’t post it.
For myself, if you can’t handle debate then I’m sure we wouldn’t be friends in real life anyway. Successful discourse requires two way communication not just pontification of your own thoughts. I usually try to keep my discussions to the topic at hand without any personal attacks. I also try to refrain from name-calling and inflammatory comments. I say ‘try’ because even I lose my shit sometimes.
Anyway, I’m off topic a bit. If you friend someone you don’t really know on social media, you shouldn’t be overly surprised if they don’t always fall in line with your view of things. Barring said personal attacks mentioned above, you should try to converse and debate vs just writing them off and unfriending them. You, or they, might learn something. You also have the added benefit of developing a deeper understanding of your own belief. Teaching or explaining concepts to others forces you to better understand it for yourself.
Everyone is jockeying for the moral high ground after the Ferguson verdict. Social media is a shit-show of everyone pointing fingers at each other. I won’t even go into all the judge/juries that have appointed them selves verdict makers on Brown/Wilson’s implied guilt.
I feel like I have a unique perspective on the subject. [1] No surprise there right? lol There is my work side that deals with law-enforcement issues every day of my career. I can see valid points from the officer’s story. There were several things Brown could have done to avoid the confrontation. Then there is my gay side that grew up at the hands of very rough and not so friendly police on more than one occasion. I can see valid points from Brown’s family. The police could have handled the situation better and not necessarily let it escalate out of control.
The reality is neither side is blameless. No one has the moral high ground here. And no one should walk away feeling like they lost/won. We all lost. People often can’t resolve the cognitive dissonance created by the ambiguity of fault or blame. And because of this, we can’t admit that neither side is blameless. Brown refused to comply, Wilson overreacted. [2]Please spare me unnecessary rants on the variances of this over simplification
No matter who’s side you are on it still means nothing unless we act. If we truly want to fix these problems, we must move beyond the never-ending and condescending tantrums via social media. And while petitions and marches in the streets are excellent displays of solidarity, they are not enough. These things depend on someone else to fix our problems.
We as a citizenry must be involved. We cannot abandon, thru indifference, our oversight of those we place in power and be surprised when it suddenly becomes corrupt. Civic duty is not just serving jury duty or voting, begrudgingly. It is our guaranteed right thru the freedoms granted us. But we must exercise those rights. It should not be something we only do when it is convenient. It should be a part of our daily lives. [3]Do me a favor and read this paragraph again If more of us get involved, we won’t need to constantly focus on blame. We’ll be in forums to constantly give oversight, feedback, and accountability to both sides.
Basically, I’m saying be involved or shut up and accept your servitude. It is that simple. Like any living thing, democracy must be fed or it dies from neglect. Go to your local police community meetings. If they aren’t offered, rally your neighbors and friends and demand they have them. Go to your governing body’s public meetings. Call, write, and/or email your local and state leaders. And don’t do it once and call it good. Involvement is ongoing. Embrace your civic duties. Then and only then can we see real change.
can see, I’m on the mend. The doc says the procedure went very well and he was able to accomplish everything.
Apparently, the problem has been brewing for some time. The lower orbital bone was very thin due to constant pressure over a long period of time. The final conclusion is my condition is genetic and the previous latent sinus infection may have just helped bring it forward sooner. He said had the bone completely disappeared, the fix would have been much more involved. I guess in an odd way, the infection turned out to be a good thing.
The procedure itself was pretty simple. The goal was to insert a polyurethane ‘sled’ into the orbital sheath that surrounds my eye. It sits above the orbital bone but below the eye. He didn’t have to cut my face at all; he went thru the eye lid. Basically, he made an incision in the orbital sheath, shoved the sled in, and then placed it properly. Apparently, he had to make some last minute modifications as the eye sinkage was down and backwards or inward. The inwards part is what is believed to have caused the double vision. Anyway, he was very pleased with the procedure and said it went as well as it could have been expected.
My vision was immediately better, even from my initial recovery from anesthesia. The range I could turn my head without incurring double vision was greater and my eyes take less time to focus. At the follow up visit the next day he said I should continue to expect small gradual improvements as the swelling goes down and it heals. I can no longer see a difference in my eyeballs, they look perfectly even again. [1]On close inspection, you could actually see that my right eye was lower and slightly sunken in compared to the left one. My eye still looks a bit sunken but that would be from all the swelling. Lol He seemed a bit proud of himself when measuring them. I guess it isn’t a perfect science and ‘results may vary’. I still have some double visions but even that is reduced and the angle to incur it is back to levels that would be very livable even if I saw no more improvement.
He thinks my vision, in regards to the diploma, will return to normal once all the swelling goes down. In the event it doesn’t, any minor corrections can be accomplished with contacts/glasses. They would not go back in to ‘adjust’ the sled unless there was ‘slippage’. Again, he seemed to indicate the sled was a perfect fit and I shouldn’t expect any problems. Since, I already need contacts for my slight near-sightedness in the same eye, it would just be a matter of adjusting my prescription with a slight prism enhancement.
So far, my daily vision is better. I’ve noticed several improvements including no more feelings that my eyes were routinely fighting with each other for focus. It sounds odd but I’d begun to notice my right eye was weaker. Anytime, my head tilt didn’t compensate for proper view, the right eye would sort of just give up for a bit then finally refocus. That affect is all but gone now. The double vision at sharp angles and looking up is still present but greatly reduced. I’m hopeful each day will bring additional improvements. Either way, I’m eagerly awaiting being all healed up.
I don’t think I realized how much it bothered me until after I had the surgery. We pretty much take our vision for granted in our daily comings/goings. Before the surgery, it had gone from being a random annoyance to a daily struggle. It would often take minutes vs seconds for my eyes to gain cohesive focus in the mornings. Anything outside the front facing slightly downward view would become two images. It was odd noticing how much detail was lost when trying to ascertain between two distinct images. My apprehension level went up every day as my vision decreased. People had started commenting on the angle of my head as I had developed an unconscious habit of tiling my head up to compensate. Ironically, work life was impacted the least. I think because I already tend to view my monitors slightly below eye level. Anyway, the daily coping would have only lasted so much longer. Now that the surgery is over my eye sight is amazingly better. Seeing the abrupt difference really brought home how bad it had gotten. I’m incredibly grateful it went ok.
Now, I just need to wait it out. Daily eye drops and lots of ice for the swelling. Time will tell if my vision is 95% or 90% restored.
I’m scheduled to go in for my second (and hopefully) final procedure tomorrow. As mentioned, the first procedure was to clean out the latent infection in my sinus.
I’ve officially been diagnosed with asymptomatic chronic maxillary sinusitis, otherwise known as silent sinus syndrome. It is somewhat uncommon but basically my right sinus is reduced in size. The infection could have been part of that, it could have been genetic, or both. Regardless, the reduced sinus is putting negative pressure on my orbital socket. Basically, it is pulling my eye down.
The procedure tomorrow requires the doc to insert a ‘sled’ into my eye to restore the orbit to its normal position. In most cases, patients with diplopia symptoms, like myself, go back to normal or almost normal vision. I certainly hope I fall into the ‘normal’ category.
It is considered out-patient procedure and I should only need a day or two recovery. Last time I had more recovery from the anesthesia than I did the procedure itself. lol
This will be the 4th official implant. Both collar bones and one leg. If I turn ashen grey and start spouting "we are borg", you know I’ve turned into an evil cyborg bent on world domination. Until then, fingers crossed everything goes well tomorrow!
I guess I haven’t been gushing enough about the STBH [1]soon to be hubby lately. There have been ‘inquries’. lol Well, prepare for the gushing….
Things are awesome! I consider myself incredibly fortunate to have found such a great life partner. And he is just that, my partner in life. I don’t for a second doubt I’ll spend the rest of my life with him. I even love the things that annoy me about him. How’s that for gushing? haha
We are ever so slowly settling into our life together. I still can’t wait to see him every day. Even when that being together often means being piled up on the couch watching tv or playing video games. It’s funny because there are times when I feel like I’m neglecting him and not knowing what I’m thinking he’ll check to make sure he isn’t neglecting me. Then another time, it will happen in reverse from him to me. If that isn’t love, I don’t know what is?
If you follow him on FB, you’ll know he finally got the new job he’s been after. I’m happy for him as he has been wanting to make a change for awhile now. It is no secret, he does NOT handle change well. That said, he is adjusting to the new gig, and given more time I think he will appreciate it. From my perspective, it is leaps ahead of his old job, in every way possible. /tangent
It is an odd feeling (in a good way) to realize that the person next to you just doesn’t care how imperfect you are. They love you imperfections and all.
It should come as no surprise that I have a slightly twisted sense of humor. Knowing that, it should also not surprise you that I enjoyed the act of explaining the difference between being stupid or ignorant to someone recently.
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I comment a lot on news blogs/sites these days. This often earns me a ton of hateful comments/emails. Since my blog usually doesn’t allow new commentors w/o the author having been approved at least once, they end up in my inbox. heehee I don’t share them on my blog because that is not my purpose. One day I might do a post dedicated to a small list of the champions. I mostly ignore them but every now and then the desire to “correct someone on the internet who is wrong” is too strong to resist. lol
I usually try not to be insulting, rude, or a jerk but we all have our limits. Beyond that, I’m also fair-minded and a big believer if you complain, offer a solution to fix the problem. I often war with myself over whether I should ‘feed the trolls‘ by commenting or just ignore it. The level of ignorance and anti-inllectualism prevelant in society is alarming. If we don’t find some way to counter-act that nonsense, we are headed for a social calamity soon.
Until then, I humbly strive to pick and choose my battles with the forces of ignorance.
I’m a big believer in facts. Numbers matter but context matters just as much. It seems to be a common tactic these days for people to throw out a number and then try to twist it to fit an ideal. While sometimes the confusion could be forgiven, when it is obvious the fact is presented after the ideal as validation, one should be suspect. lol
Point and case, I got into a debate with a conservative person the other day over marriage rights. It was online and the topic diverged into a discussion about Fox News and said person’s argument, ‘if Fox news is so bad, why does it routinely rank very high in viewers?‘ Said person was quite smug and very matter-of-fact about how the ‘majority’ of Americans got there news from Fox.
No, no, and just no. The failure in logical reasoning here is the assumption it is a one or the other choice. It isn’t. The rest of us aren’t limited to just one other option. We have a plethora of outlets to get our daily consumption for what passes for news these days. The idea that Fox is somehow the voice of Americans due to a large viewing base is categorically false. What it does show is that the extremists have limited choices and Fox is pretty much it. Not surprising, said person then resorted to typical diversionary tactics to avoid further debate.
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On a side note, Fox news went to court in 2003 on whether it was required to report factual news. Fox won as the judge ruled there was no legal requirement for them to do so!
I’ll just let that sink in for a bit.
Because there is no actual law that requires news agencies to report factual news, they don’t have to? Where is the moral and ethical obligation? Concurrently, Fox has since gone from a reputable news agency to a propaganda arm for extremist views. Welcome to “murrica”.
No, I’m not dredging up stories of child hood fishing trips or late night trolling for booty. I am referring to the out of control click-bait you see polluting most social media sites these days.
Headlines are written to provoke a click. It doesn’t matter if the headline isn’t true or so twisted to barely represent the story, as long as you ‘submit’. [1]Reference to a very funny Simpsons episode btw Most of the time said person sharing the click-bait hasn’t even read the link. It it is annoying to the point that I’ve started unfollowing people who do it a lot.
It is one thing if it is specifically related to you or your life. Beyond that, I don’t care what animal you are. I don’t care what cartoon character you are. I don’t care what your wanna be porn name is. I don’t care what character in any movie ever made is. I don’t care if you are a unicorn who burps glitter and shits rainbows. And here is a news flash, no one else does either!
And you people who share fake stories or scams “just to be safe” need to be punched in the dick! Knock. It. Off! No Bill Gates and Yahoo are not joining forces. No, the IRS is not sending the sheriffs to your house to arrest you unless you send them money. No, the quadrillionaire in [insert county here] did not die and leave all his money in limbo so his [insert relative or estated holder] can ask your help in getting the money. No, VI@gR@ will not help you ‘get the girl.’ No, “if you are a real ______, you will share this like I did.” And for fuck’s sake, NO YOU WILL NOT RECEIVE A LOT OF MONEY BY MAGIC IF YOU POST THIS TO 10 OTHER PEOPLE’S PROFILES.
I thought I’d provide a public service announcement today. Let me attempt to clarify (and edify) you on the differences between belief and bigotry.
Belief (or faith) in your [deity of choice] is soley your choice in life. Under the freedoms granted to you in our democracy, you are free to believe and celebrate (thru prayer, church, communion, etc) said belief thru its given dogma any way you choose. While I may or may not agree with your belief(s), you are entitled to them and I respect that. You are free to believe that being gay is an abomination. [1]So is eating shell-fish. Where is the outrage over shrimp? I mean just look at those nasty little buggers! They have ‘demon’ written all over them! You are free to hate me for being gay. Hate is not illegal. You are free to think that I will be transported to a magical place of fire/brimestone upon my death. You are free to ignore the fact that I was born gay. You are free to disagree with the later statement verbally. You are free to say your beliefs and share them with others by proselytizing [2]witnessing. These are your rights.
What you are not free to do is enforce your belief onto me, thru laws or otherwise. You are not free to commit a crime against me based on your hate. When you attempt to enforce your belief(s) onto me you are engaged in bigotry. You are not free to discriminate against me based on your belief when you provide public accommodations. You are not free force me to live your way. You are not free to prevent me from having the same rights as any other human being simply because I’m different. We do not live in a theocracy. And no matter how you might wish we did, we still do not. Your belief does not shield you from persecution when you cross over into being a bigot. And calling you out for your bigotry does not make you a victim of persecution. And no amount of cognitive dissonace, conflation, or twisting the english language will ever make it so.
Now you know. Go forth and edify others; so it is my commandment to you this 17th day of October in the year 11 of Moby’s blog.
Well, I’m finally feeling almost normal again. It only took four days after the sedation for it to happen. I must say I’m a little bit surprised it took so long. Everyone keeps telling me my body needs more rest but I’ve never taken this long to ‘bounce back‘ before. I have very little physical discomfort but the light-headness and down right crankiness has stayed with me. The Pup says I’ve been a little more silly at home the last few days. [1]I’m never cranky with him. Yes, I realize it could be my age. But I’m also thinking it has a lot to do with my lack of gym attendance. I haven’t really been consistently working out and I definitely feel the difference. The last couple surgeries were much more invasive and I was nowhere near this messed up aftewards.
I ended up calling off work early yesterday as I just couldn’t focus and my crankiness was getting the better of me. [2]Never a good thing. lol I guess I should have taken more time off. Coworkers have noticed and commented on how much more of myself I am today so I guess it has showed.
I had my Post Op appointment with the doc yesterday and he didn’t seem worried. He indicated it wasn’t unusual to feel some after effects. The procedure was a success and there appears to be no need to do any follow up work to clean out the latent infection material. He did spring the news that he wants to refer me to yet another specialist for the final surgery. Just what I need, another round of copays and visits. But to be fair, I guess I’d rather have someone who already does the work I need vs just taking a stab at it. I’m looking at 4-6 weeks, which puts it right smake in the middle of the holidays. Work will be so pleased. (NOT!)
