society – Page 11 – Moby Files: Blog

Hate Springs Eternal

I’m fond of saying “hope springs eternal”. It is something I picked up as a kid and it stuck with me. Well, I’m sad to say it seems the same is true of hate. I got my first hate mail in ages today. I think primarily as I’ve been bouncing around news blogs more than usual leaving comments on current events.

Today’s douchebag in ass-hattery was smart enough to use a hotmail account. An account I have since reported to MS as the content violates their fair-use clause. I have no idea what MS will do but whateva.

Said pathetic soul started out with the usual vitriol, you’ll burn in hell, filthy disgusting queer, blah blah blah. To his credit, the punctuation and spelling were pretty good. ^[1]Of course, anyone w/spell and grammar check can do that with a minimal of effort. Most of the hate mails of past were always riddled with typos, poor punctuation/spelling, etc. Not to say that haters are stupid, maybe they are just lazy?

Anyway, I enjoy getting hate mail as it signals that I hit a nerve somewhere. To date, I’ve yet to encounter anyone who can back up their hatred with cold hard facts. Oh yeah, the fall back on religion, biology, and tradition. But those are so pathetically frail as to be laughable. Anyone with half a brain can overturn the reasoning on all three counts with just minimal education. So called “christians” really get pissy when you quote their own book at them refudiating ^[2]I couldn’t help poking phone at Sarah Palin’s stupidity. their nonsense.

I find the best way to approach said nut-jobs is to reply to them in calm, matter-of-fact tones, no matter how excited they get. This drives them absolutely fucking nuts! Being unable to rile you sends them into frenzies of anger. heehee It really is quite fun and I highly recommend it.

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References
↑1	Of course, anyone w/spell and grammar check can do that with a minimal of effort.
↑2	I couldn’t help poking phone at Sarah Palin’s stupidity.

Sign Here

*This applies to everyone reading, not just locals*

Integrity and honesty seems to be going out the window more and more every day. I’ve had more than one episode w/paid signature gatherers lying about the petitions they are asking people to sign. I’ve also seen stories all over the national media regarding similar instances. The last episode occurred before our most recent local elections here in SF last week. I was on a lunch break from work and ran by Safeway to grab some grub. A man was soliciting signatures for a local proposition that deals w/City employees and retirement benefits. I’m nowhere near retirement age yet but I still pay attention to such things as frankly, I already give 38% of my salary in various taxes. . Right off the bat, the guy is lying in his spiel to gain interest from people walking by. I feigned ignorance and asked him to explain it to me. He proceeds to flat out lie even more on the several key points of the proposition. I waited for him to finish and then laid into him very loudly. I basically told him in none too polite terms he should be ashamed of himself for lying in an attempt to pass a proposition. He gets sarcastic and replies, “look! I’m paid to be here gathering signatures and that’s what I’m doing.” Really? You’re paid to lie? I was so furious I had to walk away as I honestly felt the need to pummel his face repeatedly. I encourage everyone to read documents before you sign. You would think its a no-brainer but often times we are lulled into a sense of trust based on very believable progaganda. The reality is you could very well be signing your rights away out of ignorance. If you can’t take the time to read what you’re signing, no matter how good it sounds to you, don’t sign it. My maw-maw was fond of saying, “believe none of what you hear and half of what you see.” Never has it been more true than today.

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References
↑1	like myself
↑2	The petition failed thankfully!
↑3	or what we want to believe

Scurr’ed

It’s no secret I rarely rant about politics. Of course, there are times where I feel compelled to speak up. The current political climate would be hysterical if it wasn’t so incredibly scary.

The attack on Prez Obama continues simply because is he is black. I doubt anyone can now deny that racism is alive and well in this country today. Oh it has learned to cover its head w/pretty catch phrases but a skunk is still a skunk. And while I’ll be the first to admit Prez Obama has let me down, he has also shown a remarkable willingness to promote many gay Americans to positions of authority and power. And for all the folks out there threatening NOT to vote for him next year or not vote at all, I’ll remind you that the choices on the GOP are far far worse than any let-downs President Obama may have inflicted on us. Tread carefully in your self-righteous anger. We need to continue to support Obama while continuing to demand he take more action to help us toward true equality. If not, we have no one to blame but ourselves for letting those who would see us 2nd-class citizens (or worse, dead) win the battle.

I must admit I am somewhat surprised by the views of several of the “christian” organizations out there, NOM (NO on Marriage) and the dual freaks Eugene Delgaudio & Bryan Fischer to just name a few. These folks hide behind their religious dogma and preach hatred and lies in the name of what is “right.” They talk about the moral majority with a fervor that is unparalleled. I think it’s because deep in their tiny cruel insecure hearts they know the majority is changing. People care less and less about being told what they should do and more about what they need to do to survive. More and more every day people are waking up to the simple truth that gays are just normal folks who just happen to have a same-sex attraction. To combat that eventual ideology change, these hate-mongers spew their vitriol and venom at every opportunity to continually scare their listeners into fearing the gays.

I have no problem with someone who honestly disagrees with me or my life. I disagree with many folks myself. And while I think the above mentioned folks are horribly misguided, I could at least respect them if they held to the “values” they claim to espouse. But these folks have no convictions, morals, or values. They are simply afraid of the unknown and they will stop at nothing to keep that fear alive. Their flimsy morals are discarded as they push for their way of life to be the only way of life.

I’ve always said I think the biggest way to change people’s perceptions of us is to live openly/honestly. The more of us that live our lives in the open w/no shame, the more ordinary folks will realize we are different but only in very subtle ways…ways that in the grand scheme of things matter very little.

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↑1	and the LGBT umbrella that includes

E-what?

It’s no secret that I’m a big proponent of the digital age. It’s been great to see the push to convert traditional printed media to e-formats; be it music, video, books, magazines, etc. In an ideal world this would mean people are getting more access to content they own with a minimal of fuss and a lot less waste of natural resources.

Sadly the reality is somewhat different. The ridiculous and often extremely out-dated copyright laws in this country are strangling the growth of the digital convergence. Not to mention even more ridiculous restrictions by content authors. And if not updated soon, it promises to make things even worse. There are 3 different bills regarding copyright and “fair use” circulating thru congress as we speak. ^[1]I read up a lot on TechDirt. I highly recommend you follow them if you like reading about such stuff. None of which does anything to improve access to the consumer. I blame the whole Napster/RIAA drama for jumpstarting an atmosphere of litigation based on irrational fears, ignorance, and flat out lies. Every independent study I’ve ever read shows pirated content makes up a fraction of the total online availability of econtent. Granted, theft is theft regardless of the format. That being said, the approach here is draconian and ineffective. For every illegal site taken down, 10 more pop up.

You’ll always have a few folks who want to beat/cheat the system. That won’t go away so trying to legislate them out of existence is an exercise in futility. Most people on the other hand will do the honest/right thing when given the option a convenient, cheap, and effective distribution model. Case and point, I can view an e-subscription of the SF Chronicle on an actual Kindle device but I can’t view the same subscription on an iPad, iPod, or Android device running the very same Kindle software. ^[2]Don’t get me wrong, I’m not picking on Amazon as this isn’t their doing. Now how exactly does that solve anything? I’ll tell you what it solves; it means I won’t be buying an esubscription (or any other) to the Chronicle. Instead, I’ll continue to scour the web for my news/info from free sites. Yes, it’s a bit harder but I want to consume content when it’s convenient to me. A prime example of control vs. use gone wrong. Considering printed newspapers are already dying a slow death, it borders on sheer stupidity to limit your user base. While I can get the same content for free elsewhere, I am perfectly willing to fork over a small monthly fee for
congregated content related to my interests.

Another example. Two of my favorite scifi/horror authors have several eBooks online for sale ^[3]at the same price as a paperback which is ridiculous in itself but whatever. yet once again you can only get it on this device or that. Even worse, several books in a series are available but 1 or 2 in the series aren’t. Once again, does it mean I’ll run out and buy the missing book in traditional paper? NO! It means I will pass on the entire series until I can get all of them in the format of my
choosing.

I am hopeful that companies and authors will wise up and realize they are cutting their own financial throats. The music industry was dragged kicking and screaming into the digital age and for all their fear-mongering and lies; they are still making money hand over fist. The RIAA even admitted a while back that yes, pirated content is only a fraction of global sales and distribution. tsk, tsk! Why other industries haven’t learned from them is beyond me. Actually, that’s not true, I know why. Greed. They are holding onto dying, yet originally more profitable, distribution models. ^[4]And don’t even get me started on the things people/companies actually try to
copyright now. As they watch traditional distribution (and consumption) of content dry up, they become ever more restrictive of the content itself. They seem to overlook the fact that while newer digital distribution models demand less per person, they reach a much much larger audience (and cost a whole lot less to produce). This more than makes up for any loss. One would think it’s a no-brainer but sadly not.

References[+]

References
↑1	I read up a lot on TechDirt. I highly recommend you follow them if you like reading about such stuff.
↑2	Don’t get me wrong, I’m not picking on Amazon as this isn’t their doing.
↑3	at the same price as a paperback which is ridiculous in itself but whatever.
↑4	And don’t even get me started on the things people/companies actually try to copyright now.

Pinch Me

Jimbo had a rant about fake bloggers the other day on his blog so I thought I’d weigh in. I must admit, its been a long time since anyone called me a fake here. I guess partly because I don’t blog as much as I used to. I also post so much of myself online, you have to be a bloody idiot to think I’m a fake. lol I’ve blogged before about fakes but I figure its worth repeating.

Anyway, I got a kick out of all the outrage that people were blathering on about. Really? You’re shocked that someone is posing as someone else online? You obviously don’t get out enough. Yeah, I get why people are upset but you have to temper that with a bit of reason. People effin’ lie! They’ve been doin it for centuries and this new fangled interweb thingy just makes it that much easier. I liked that Jimbo ranted about the old AO-Hell ^[1]my moniker for the ever shitty AOL. The only company that I ever said has customer service worse than AT&Tdays. The fakes back then were fast and free and it was almost an art form to be able to separate the real from the fake. With a little bit of patience and objectivity, it really is easy to spot the fakes. Let little ole me edumacate you in the process. (I’m referring to personal blogs of everyday people.)

Rule #1 and the most important axiom to follow. As my maw-maw always said, ‘believe none of what you hear, and half of what you see.’ That just means if it sounds to good to be true, it usually is. Or at the very least, you should proceed with caution until you know for sure.

Pictures are a tried and true give away. People who chronicle their lives thru blogs naturally enhance their blogging thru pictures/videos. Pics/videos also evolve over time as people do. This is a big one for me personally. If I stumble over a personal blog with no pictures of the blogger, I’m already wary.

If the blogger has to go to great lengths to convince you they are real, they probably aren’t. I had one faker try to use me as ammo once because we had interacted online for awhile. I guess he thought I’d vouch for him. Considering I’d never met said person and only seen one self-pic, I took him with a grain of salt. When he tried to drag me into the blog war, I quickly let him know I wouldn’t be vouching for anyone I’d never seen in person. He then tried to act all hurt. Bless his heart.

Disclosure: I myself got suckered once, big time. I’m happy to admit it. I got hoodwinked partly because I wanted to believe the person was real. I ignored some of the small cues that gave it away. In the end someone else, out of bitterness which I also didn’t approve of, exposed the fake. It would have come out eventually but the way it did was messy and had a very nasty ripple effect.

So there you have it. If you can use my methodology above, you’ll have a hard time getting suckered.

To be fair, I still read a couple blogs that I know are fake. I find the blog( s ) entertaining and as long as they don’t hurt anyone, who am I to judge? ^[2]One of them I’ve been reading almost as long as I’ve been blogging. And no, don’t ask me cause I’m not trying to stir up drama for anyone else. And at the end of the day, that is the final distinction for me. If someone perpetrates harm then I’m having none of it and all for exposing them for the liars they are. But I also realize not everyone is comfortable being themselves, even in an online scenario. We have artists/authors who perform under alias all the time. Omission is still lying. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not condoning lying. Its pointless and often leads to grief. But I also don’t act all self-righteous every time I discover someone is a fake. Nor do I go on a witch hunt. I wish everyone was as bluntly honest as I am but sadly, it just ain’t so. I live/act how’d I’d like the world to be but I also realize I can’t control others. For you few long time readers, you know I’m all about distinctions. Some distinctions, however subtle, are the most important.

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References
↑1	my moniker for the ever shitty AOL. The only company that I ever said has customer service worse than AT&T
↑2	One of them I’ve been reading almost as long as I’ve been blogging. And no, don’t ask me cause I’m not trying to stir up drama for anyone else.

Assume The Position

On a recent ride, I found it somewhat amusing when a riding buddy shocked an employee of a local and very busy biker hangout. Basically, the employee replied to a buddy’s comment about it being a nice day. The employee said something to the effect, “and the pretty girls.” Well my (male) friend w/o even really thinking anything of it said, “and the pretty guys“. You could tell it was totally not the answer the employee was expecting! Now don’t get me wrong, he wasn’t ignorant or stupid, he was just surprised. He didn’t break stride or even turn around. It was a very subtle but obvious change in his movements that gave him away. It also cracked me the hell up! This leads me into my post today.

My assumption is that because we were motorcycle riders, he naturaly assumed we were straight. Of course, I get that it ties into Western society’s over-emphasis on male/fem characteristics, hobbies, etc. But that’s a way deeper well to dive into on some other day…

Anyway, it struck me as noteworthy because I’ve become so accustomed to my openness about being gay. I just so rarely think about it in a public forum anymore. I always just assume anyone who meets me knows I’m gay. I make no pretense about it how could they not know? [Insert joke here] It still surprises me when someone doesn’t pick up on it. ( On an unrelated side note, this begs the question about gays learning to pick up on said subtle clues more astutely than our straight counter-parts.)

Of course, I’d forgotten that perception can be a powerful thing. I’m sure you’ve heard the old adage, ‘perception is 9/10’s of reality.‘ Well, case and point. lol The human brain becomes hard-wired to expect certain actions, in this case behaviors. It will often (given time and/or more cues) pick up on subtle, out-of-the-norm differences, sometimes consciously, sometimes not. I’m sure given more time to observe us, the employee would have figured it out. 😉 Ironically, now that I think back on it, I can remember several rides where the same thing has occurred.

My buddy and I got a nice chuckle out it nonetheless. And we continued to cruise guys.

Free Hate

The world was a buzz yesterday with the news that the SCOTUS ruled in favor of WBC ^[1]I won’t list their full name here being able to picket soldier’s funerals, among other things.

As horrible, shameful, and disgustingly vile I find the whole clan, I’m in agreement with the court. You can’t support a principle only when it benefits you. Living by a code of conduct (and/or laws) should apply to everyone. We can legislate what a person does when motivated by hate but the act of hate is and should not be illegal, nor should it be. Trying to legislate someone’s thoughts is a very slippery and dangerous road to go down. Such a path inevitably leads to ruin.

Most people think the WBC are about being anti-gay. I actually disagree. If you’ve ever been around anyone who is a fundamentalist in their religious beliefs, you discover really quickly one of their big, and I mean big, goals is trying to convert others to their cause. Its called proselytizing or testifying . If you step back from the raw emotion for a moment, you’ll notice the WBC clan don’t just focus on gay rights. They focus on anything that will get them lots and lots of attention. They’ve used extreme shock value to gain nationwide, possibly even global, recognition. Their hope is to convert as many people as possible to their beliefs. Its an ingenious approach but I’d argue its not having the intended affect. lol Growing up in the South, we always believed in shining a light on a cockroach. It does one of two things. It either scurries away to hide or it shows you how truly hideous it really is. In this case I think it’s the latter.

Think about what it must be like to have grown up in such a clan. A world shaped by their father to be absolute black and white. No room for grey or error. No compassion, no love, no forgiveness, only condemnation and pain. For you few yet faithful long time readers, see any correlation here? lol Yeah, I can understand it. Doesn’t mean I can accept it but understanding is the first step in conquering something you fear.

For my .02, we should continue to shine a light on the WBC’s petty hate and fear. Let the world see what comes from fundamentalist religious beliefs. For every 1 person they convert, they push 10 more away.

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↑1	I won’t list their full name here

Hate Springs Eternal

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References
↑1	Of course, anyone w/spell and grammar check can do that with a minimal of effort.
↑2	I couldn’t help poking phone at Sara Palin’s stupidity.

just sayin’…

Ok, so not to be a douche or a heartless bastard but standing in line at a fast food restaurant and bitching about why your very large ass can’t loose weight is probably not the best solution. In fact, it shows that you are just unwilling to make an effort. Don’t get me wrong, loosing weight is hard work. But you didn’t gain 75+ lbs overnight and expecting to loose it so quickly is unrealistic. It takes a methodical consistent approach with room for failed attempts.

I get so tired of folks who are overweight complaining and yet doing nothing about it. And before you go off on the medical conditions, only a very tiny tiny percentage of the actual population suffers from said conditions. It may not be all your fault but it is your problem.

Let’s be real. We live in a society where convenience and speed is valued more than health. We’ve become obsessed with the “instant gratification” mentality in almost every aspect of our lives. Even our schools no longer focus on promoting and teaching good nutrition. Hell, the very people who supply us our food go out of their way to trick us with misleading labels. It shouldn’t come as a surprise that our culture is mostly overweight.

That said, at the end of the day it is ultimately up to each and everyone of us to keep ourselves healthy. Sitting back and whining while shoveling a weeks worth of dietary fat content down your gullet in on sitting is not the answer. And while not always the most convenient, there are plenty of ways to eat healthier. At the end of the day, if more people walked away from the convenience of fast food and focused on healthy eating, companies would sit up, take notice, and provide a healthier product.

/rant

Surprise

Everyone seems ‘surprised’ by the recent events revolving around the teenage girl Constance, who was duped into going to a fake prom while everyone else went to a different one. Or that Derrick was kicked out by his parents for wanting something so simple and easy as taking his boyfriend to the prom. Really? You are surprised? What world have you been living in? Have we insulated ourselves behind our little bubbles (neighborhoods) that we have forgotten the harsh realities?

Just because I now live in the (make believe) mecca, I haven’t forgotten where I came from and what I went thru growing up. I have all the respect in the world for Constance and Derrick. They took the high road knowing it would create hardship. Granted they probably never realized how big it would become but still. They chose to stand-up and demand equality. They will go into adulthood with a sense of strength lacking in many of their classmates and be better for it.

The really surprising thing about this whole ordeal is that it took this long for it to come out (pun intended). How many of us over the years have gone thru the same or similar situation? I certainly knew I couldn’t bring my boyfriend to the prom way back when. ^[1]I didn’t go. I figured if I couldn’t bring who I really wanted, the hell with it. Hell, they might have actually stoned me had I tried. These horrible ideals aren’t new or even surprising. As we become more visible in society more of our struggles will see the light of day. And while I can’t fault those who take the safe route in their lives, I can acknowledge and support those who do.

As the need for news and information has gone global, courtesy of the internet, people everywhere begin to see the harsh reality of what its sometimes like to grow up gay in America. We need to continue to focus on stories like this. We need to shine the light of day on those who would hide behind fear, ignorance, and religion to justify treating human beings less than human. The great thing about the ‘sensationalist’ approach a lot of media outlets have taken too these days is more of the crazies come forward and are exposed for exactly what they are.

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↑1	I didn’t go. I figured if I couldn’t bring who I really wanted, the hell with it.