Category: rant

Right or Wrong

As you know, I rarely weigh in on politics (for a reason). However, I’ve been mulling this one over for awhile now. I’m quite sure my opinion is in the minority. Well, that is why its called an opinion. Just like assholes, ever body has one. I’ve been reading a lot of the fall out over Obama’s lackluster support for LGBT rights, gay marriage, and opposing DOMA, DODT, etc. [1]Maybe because we’ve become selfish and only notice instant gratification? Specifically, all the indignation about how our current Prez has ‘failed us’.

For the record, I am disappointed in our current President. He could be doing more to promote equality for the LGBT community. That said, I’m not ready to throw the book or even give up on him just yet. I’d like to think I have a more pragmatic view but that’s just me. When I voted for Obama, I did so knowing he would not wave a magic wand and fix everything overnight. I voted for him thinking he was the best choice of the candidates available to choose from. I still support that decision. Was he perfect for gays? No. We knew that ahead of time. Will he deliver on everything he promised? Probably not. What President ever has? The last President who rushed into trying to overcome centuries of prejudice left us with DADT. Oh what a great compromise that turned out to be.

While I am disappointed by Obama’s lackluster support, I am also trying to see the bigger picture here. Our country is facing some of the largest crises in our history. Our financial markets are practically in ruins from rampant deregulation. Our country is virtually broke and we are “robbing Peter to pay Paul”. [2]If China called in our debt, this would be the US of China. Our healthcare system is on the verge of collapsing under its on mismanaged weight. More and more companies are going under daily and adding to the already record numbers of unemployed. Not to mention, we are facing two wars overseas, a pending disaster with North Korea, and now Iran’s turmoil threatens to embroil us even further.

And here is the part that irritates me the most. We are quick to jump on the “he let us down” bandwagon, but in California during the Prop 8 campaign, the number of identified LGBT voters was way lower than our actual numbers. Had more of us stood up and exercised our constitutional right to vote, I firmly believe Prop 8 would have failed. Many foolishly assumed it was ‘shoe-in’ so they did nothing while our enemies mobilized their own numbers. And look where our complacency and indifference got us. Oh yes, we were quick to point fingers and blame. And I ask you, what has that gotten us? Nothing, zero, zip, nadda, zilch. Personally, I see it as a cop-out. We blame others in an effort to absolve ourselves of any personal responsibility. In the process, we give up our power and relegate ourselves to the “helpless victim” mentality. How many of you reading this right now has contacted a single government representative at any level? Even simpler, have you done anything at all, besides complain?

I have a radical idea. How about we get off our collective asses and get involved. Whether it be thru voting, marching, volunteering, educating, donating, whatever. Everyone of us can contribute, one way or another. Contact your local, State, and Federal representatives and let them know you expect results. In an age of electronic communication, its as simple as type and click. We can forward stupid memes, pics, porn, and funny emails till we are blue in the face, but we can’t contact our elected leaders? How sad is that?

Instead of whining like petulant children about how “Obama has failed us”, we should be focused on continually keeping our struggles in the public eye. No matter how hard the haters try, we are not going away. Stop sitting on the sidelines waiting for someone else to protect us. No one is asking you to go broke for the cause but every single person can find small luxury items that could be converted to donations for LGBT organizations. [3]Booze, bars, cigarettes, starbucks, porn, etc. Blasphemy, I know. Volunteer to man phone banks, mailing lists, voter registrations, street walking campaigns, etc. There are a ton of ways each and every one of us can be part of the solution.

The point here is pinning all our hopes on one man and then getting angry when he doesn’t deliver is foolish and naive. Yes, he could be doing better. Yes, we should hold him accountable for his promises. And yes, we should continue to demand more. But, the same is true of ourselves.

/rant

References

References
↑1 Maybe because we’ve become selfish and only notice instant gratification?
↑2 If China called in our debt, this would be the US of China.
↑3 Booze, bars, cigarettes, starbucks, porn, etc. Blasphemy, I know.

Morality Reloaded

I’m feeling long winded today, you’ve been warned! I’m also touching on a subject I’ve beat a couple times here before. For the best sense of what I’m getting it, you should probably read the previous rant on the old blog. I’m specifically calling attention to an important distinction of the general use of the word vs the reality of how most people apply it.

…morality does not refer to just any guide to behavior accepted by an individual, it is that guide to behavior that the individual adopts as his overriding guide, and wants everyone else to adopt as their overriding guide as well

To start off, I realized a long time ago, I have my own set of morals. I’ve also mentioned on numerous occasions I used to never view myself as an overly “moral” person in the strictest sense of the word. And while I’ve come to realize I am a moral person, my morals are subject to my own sense of overriding right from wrong, hence the quote above. An important distinction here is my personal moral code isn’t an excuse to allow me to behave inappropriately. More importantly, I can look beyond my own sense of morality to the greater sense of right and wrong. There are behaviors I accept as ok to me that would probably not be ok if everyone adopted it. Does that sound like a contradiction? Of course it does. Morality is completely subjective and derisive in nature simply because there is no one moral code that everyone subscribes to. Even worse, the use of morality as a hammer has become common practice in our society.

*

The first half of my rant deals with the out of control religious fanaticism in Western culture today. I honestly don’t know how folks can still cling to the term ‘christian’ and look me in the eye anymore. I don’t mind telling you should you have the cojones to actually admit it to my face, my respect for you drops several points. [1]That is not to say, I discourage you from belief in God or a higher power in general.  Claiming ‘its your faith” is not an excuse anymore. Your “side” has made it clear the line has been drawn in the sand. You should be asking yourself, which side you are on?

Besides being responsible for more deaths than any other cause on the planet in our entire history, it seems that belief has become more important than right or wrong. The ‘religious right’ in this country have become extremists and a cult IMHO. They’ve taken up the banner of being in the “moral right” while using every dirty deceitful trick in the book to spread fear and hate. Well, I hate to burst your bubble but you are no longer the majority. You are fast relegating yourselves to the sidelines and will eventually become extinct. Not because of us but your own selfish narrow-minded behavior. When your convictions were tested, you failed miserably. You hide behind ‘your faith’ while resorting to the very tactics you claim to abhor in others. And to your draconian belief system I say good riddance. Offended? Lucky for you there is that lovely little X in the very right top corner of this window. Feel free to click it and never come back. My sympathy for you has been all used up. [2]As a side note, anyone claiming to be ‘christian in defense of their comments here will have their comments deleted.

*

The other half of my little rant today is about a disturbing trend I’ve noticed in general in our society lately. Specifically, people no longer seem to care about the truth when arguing an objective based on ‘morality’. You hear the word moral thrown around a lot in circles discussing everything from Obama to gay rights. The sad twist is many of these same folks stoop to deceit, half-truths, and outright lies to prove said moral point. I’m speaking mostly in relation to the gay rights struggle, but it is much broader than that. Seeing the lengths that people go thru to defame and trash our current president is astounding and shameful. He isn’t responsible for this current state of crisis and expecting him to fix it overnight is beyond foolish, it is stupid.

The ‘fundie” extremists and I do agree on one thing. Our society is facing a moral decay. It isn’t ‘the gays’ that are causing it though. It is our personal greed blinding us to the simple truth that we are no longer a righteous people. Western society has become nothing more than a bunch of controlling corrupt power mongering whiners focused on their own personal gain. We can’t say the word ‘fuck’ on prime time TV but it is perfectly acceptable behavior for hospitals to turn patients out into the street because they are too poor to pay for health care. Gays can’t get married but it is perfectly ok to defraud hundreds of thousands of people out of jobs so you can run a get-rich-quick scheme. No, we are too focused on me, me, me, me to care about our neighbors, fellow man, the planet, or the common decency that used to bind us all together.

So, is this where I complain about moving to another country or planet? No. Instead, I continue to live openly and honestly about who and what I am. I continue to see the good in all of us. I continue to behave in a way that I can be proud of and look back on without shame. I strive to better myself and move forward w/o the need to trample over my fellow man to do it. My own moral compass may be fractured and flawed in comparison but it still points me due North. I will follow it until the end of my days. Can you say the same?

References

References
↑1 That is not to say, I discourage you from belief in God or a higher power in general.
↑2 As a side note, anyone claiming to be ‘christian in defense of their comments here will have their comments deleted.

Color Me Crazy

As if the drama last night wasn’t enough, I got called a ‘crazy racist’ online today because I wasn’t attracted to a guy sexually. Not the first time and probably not the last. Here is our conversation.

Him: Nice profile and pics, wanna come f*ck me?

Me: Hey bud, I appreciate the offer but not really a match for me. Happy Hunting.

Him: Why don’t you just admit your crazy racist ass-hole. You make me sick. [1]I got a little annoyed here and my reply could have been worded better, I’m sure.

Me: Wait. Because, I’m not attracted to you, I’m a racist asshole? And first you want me to fuck you but then I make you sick? Which is it? I could have just hit the delete button like a lot of guys on here. I took the time to politely say, “no thanks” and I’m the asshole? So, in that vein of thought, what I should have said is, “no thanks, your fugly”. Would that have been better? Do me a favor, don’t project your inability to handle rejection onto me.

Him: *I got a follow up reply but I deleted it without opening it.*

Like I said, I could have handled it better by just ignoring his pissy email. That’s my shit and I own it, moving on. Keeping in mind here, there are no racial references for or against anywhere in any of my profile(s). This leap of logic on his part was unfounded and completely out of line.

*

So, to beat this horse properly we first need to identify several important but often lost distinctions. First, there is the very real existence of racism. Right behind that comes ignorance/indifference. And bringing up the rear (pun intended) is physical attraction (or not) to certain physical traits common to one race or another.

I am not so foolish to think racism is gone in America. Quite the contrary, some of the nasty fallout over our new president shows it is still very much alive. This makes absolutely no sense to me. Forgetting for a moment the races are blending more and more with every generation, dismissing a whole section of society based solely on their race is offensive and can be classified as racism.

In relation to the gay community, I don’t think it is out and out racism as much as ignorance. [2]I am not excusing it, just stating an observation. I can’t tell you how often I see profiles with “not into Blacks or Asians.” You may not intend to be offensive but that is exactly what you are doing by making such statements. Imagine how you’d feel reading a profile of someone you found attractive and they dismissed your entire existence based on your race. I particularly love how some guys try to apologize at the same time for saying such things. If you have to apologize perhaps you shouldn’t say it. How about you just leave it out. Nothing compels you to reply, meet, or hookup with anyone you don’t wish to. Why add such inflammatory language to your profile? [3]Out of fairness, there was a time when I made this awful mistake. I am happy to say that was well over 10 years ago.

Of course, when it comes to sex you can’t force physical attraction or the lack thereof. Attraction, like our sexuality, is not always a quantifiable behavior. For the purpose of this rant, I am referring specifically to attraction and race. And herein lies the most important distinction I feel is often lost on so many. Not being attracted to a physical trait(s) common to one race or another is not racism. From my own observations, I think this is often the real root of the matter but given the ignorance mentioned above, the line quickly becomes blurred. Want a sure fire way to know? Its quite simple. If you really have no racial hang-ups, you will find that there are always exceptions to your attraction (or lack) to a particular race.

For myself, I rarely think in term of absolutes so saying I’m not into a whole race would be a lie. I have my range and it commonly crosses the races. I’ll also admit there are some physical traits common to some races I am not attracted to. And while this is a racial issue it is only in the sense of physical attraction. However, that is never an absolute either. I don’t give a rats ass what color your skin is, if I like what you have to offer and you flop it in front of me, I’m gonna taste it. Or, if I don’t, I won’t.

References

References
↑1 I got a little annoyed here and my reply could have been worded better, I’m sure.
↑2 I am not excusing it, just stating an observation.
↑3 Out of fairness, there was a time when I made this awful mistake. I am happy to say that was well over 10 years ago.

Empowerment

I rarely talk about politics here.  Mainly, as it is a very  personal thing and also beat to death pretty much  everywhere else.  I’m just feel compelled to interject my  feelings today.

For all the nay-sayers out there, our new President  [1]notice how I deftly avoid the junk filters by leaving his  name out. is off and running.  Whether you agree with  him or not, you can’t argue he is being decisive.  His  actions so far indicate a strong return of leadership in  our government beyond petty greed.  And lord knows,  he has his work cut out for him.  I personally think if he  only delivers on half of his promises, he will have put  our country back in the right direction.

And while I’m not so foolish to think the world is just  gonna become rosey overnight, I must admit of having a feeling of hope again.  Seeing our new President come out swinging with real actionable behavior gives me a bit of pride in my country once more.  I find myself believing our luck direction has changed and things will eventually get better.  If this is any indication on the rest of his term, we certainly could have done worse in our choice of a new leader.

I can’t ever remember a time in my life being so completely captivated by political news.  I think my poor tivo is confused because it has gotten used to me not recording anything political.

Mr President, I wish you luck in the months/years to come.

/rant

References

References
↑1 notice how I deftly avoid the junk filters by leaving his  name out.

Trust

In a slightly less exciting rant and not meant to damper the thrill I have from my tattoo, I discovered this weekend, and not for the first time, someone I trusted has been running their mouth about my business.  Business they were instructed was private and only shared in confidence.  Serves me right for reaching out to someone I saw in pain and deciding to share part of myself. 

Well, lesson learned. [1]And needless to say, they won’t get a 2nd opportunity

*

The irony here is for a long time I didn’t see myself as an overly moral or ethical person.  Never having the benefit of strong family ties as a child, I had to teach myself right from wrong.  All things considered, I’ve accomplished that goal to my satisfaction. [2]Of course, there is always room for improvement.  And while my own brand of morals may not be the norm, they keep me on the path I have chosen in this life.  I guess the point of my ramble here  is I’m more disappointed than angry.  Disappointed that integrity seems to be a catch phrase for most guys these days.  I’m also disappointed in someone who obviously cares more about their next drinking buddy than true friendship.

Or, it could be I’m just getting old and crotchety.  I mean my 38th birthday is fast approaching. *ducking*   

References

References
↑1 And needless to say, they won’t get a 2nd opportunity
↑2 Of course, there is always room for improvement.

Too Through

My happiness with our new President-elect is overshadowed today.  With Prop 8 expected to pass here in CA, Prop 102 in AZ and Prop 2 in Florida passing, I have lost all respect for so called “Christian” hate-mongers.  If you’ve been living under a rock, these 3 amendments write discrimination into their respective state constitutions. 

I’ve always tried to respect peoples religious beliefs however, there comes a point where your hate, fear, and ignorance cloaked in faith is no longer acceptable.  That time has come.  After this election, you’ve made it very clear you hate me and hope to forever label me as a 2nd class citizen.  Well I’m here to tell you, I am not going away no matter how hard you try.  Nor will I blithely stand by when I hear you condemning me and mine in the name of scripture and then claiming faith as an excuse. 

Of course, there are those who still claim to be “christians” who also believe in reason and human rights.  It is you folks who are now faced with a difficult choice.  You can continue to stand by and allow your religion (aka cult) to be corrupted by greed and hate or you can take a stand.  You can stand for common decency, respect, and equal treatment of all people.  You can put your fellow “christians” on notice their behavior is not acceptable and take back your faith.  But, if you choose to stand idly by and do nothing while still identifying with those who hate me, you are no longer exempt from my scorn either. [1]I feel it is worth noting, some of the most horrific atrocities ever committed in human history were done in the name of faith.

No matter how hard you try to justify your actions using archaic scripts, you know deep down it is wrong.  And it is you who is accountable for that. 

And to be clear, I don’t hate you.  But don’t expect me to ‘turn the other cheek’ any longer. 

References

References
↑1 I feel it is worth noting, some of the most horrific atrocities ever committed in human history were done in the name of faith.

Donate, Please

I rarely ask anything of my readers other than respect.  This time I am asking a little more.  Let me be clear, I am not above begging.  The extremist wingnuts couldn’t win with the truth so they’ve taken to lying in their festering evil attempt to write discrimination into the California State constitution. 

It is a sad day indeed when the “moral majority” has to resort to lying and deceit to win their case in the hearts & minds of everyday folk.  This is one of the most important votes of the century.  Whether you live in California or not, if you believe as I do, that two people regardless of their sex should be allowed to form stable, long-term LEGAL relationships under the law, then I urge you to help out.

Please, even if you can only donate $10, take a moment and hop over to

Say NO to Prop 8.

If 1 million people gave just $1.00 that would be one million in extra funds to fight the hate and lies being brought against us in the upcoming election.

I gave $400 of my own money today.  I decided to forgo the shiny new riding jacket I wanted.  Instead, I donated the money to the No to Prop. 8 campaign.  I make this pledge.  If enough people donate from this post to raise $1000.00, I will donate $400.00 more of my own money. 

Please, I urge you, take a moment to donate whatever you can.  Even if it is only a few dollars, every little bit helps when we act together. 

All of these fine folks have also helped out. I’ll add every link I discover to this post.

roblog
Romach
Joe my God
Towleroad
Bear Schmear
Queeristan
Gooster
Mathias n Oz
SwimfinsSF
thisboyelroy

McCain Still a Hypocrit

McCain Never Returned Cash from former Manhunt Chairman

While I’m still on my high horse…

So not only did they not return the money but Crutchley is still working for MH even if he is no longer on the board. He still owns a significant share of the company and not being “on the board” was window dressing to appease us so we would blithely turn away and keep looking for our next hookup.

/rant

15 years to life in S.F. dog maul death

15 years to life in S.F. dog maul death

It only took 7 years for the verdict to be reached. This dog attack was beyond despicable. It was also one of the most horrific animal attacks I’ve ever been privy to. There are things I am bound not to reveal due to rules that govern my employment. I can say she (and her husband) got off lucky. I shudder to think how much easier it might have been for them both to get off scott-free in other parts of the country. I am personally glad this person will do extended prison time but I feel it is a slap on the wrist compared to what she (and her husband) should have received.

I grew up on a farm and I love animals. I currently don’t own pets because I am not home enough and I would never allow an animal to go neglected. Leaving an animal home alone for hours (sometimes days) at a time is cruel. But, I digress. I would never, and I say NEVER, own such an aggressive dog in a City environment. Dogs are not children but the effort and control involved is similar in many aspects. Large dogs, especially naturally aggressive ones, need a lot of love, attention, and control. If trained properly it is not an overly tasking skill. When left on their own or antagonized, they become even more aggressive. As an FYI, you are solely responsible if your animal attacks a human being. [1]Yes, there are exceptions based on circumstances.

The sad reality is many people who own animals do not take personal responsibility for their animals. And, it is the animal and other helpless victims who end up suffering.

/rant

References

References
↑1 Yes, there are exceptions based on circumstances.