Category: me

Snooze

Nothing to see here. Just random shite to give everyone an update. I’m waiting for the ambien to kick in so by the end things start sounding weird [1]well, weirder than normal. you’ll know why.

First, my ongoing battle against that dastardly foe insomnia continues. I was up until 3:30am last night and promptly woke up at 8 freaking AM this morning. The night before I got about 6 hours so I’d call that a draw. I called off sick to work today. I felt too on edge and irritable and answering life/death calls in that mindset just wasn’t overly appealing. The social network crowd has been following my random spur of the moments much more closely [2]oh I’m sure they are just hanging on my every word…don’t judge me. so many of them will understand this. For you not so hip readers, I went to the doc last week and he wasn’t much help. The issue relates to a little genetic disorder that affects my hypothalamus. I’ve had it since birth. I don’t talk about it much as its more of an annoyance. This year it has become a challenge. I’m apparently not producing several key chains of enzymes that deal with the body shutting down to sleep. Ambien is very hit and miss but more often than not it will do the trick. The bad is while it is not physically addicting, it increases the difficulty of sleeping after you go off of it. Brilliant right? My other option is narcotic based drugs but that is an absolute bust for me. No matter how much I take, any amount that will put me to sleep will also leave me in a funk for hours after I wake up the next day. This not overly conducive if you ride a motorcycle. Well, if you want to stay up-right on the motorcycle that is. I know, I know, shut a nit-picker. Whatever…

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Everyone is chomping at the bit for more news about the Apple guy. Well, I don’t have much to add. We still talk, we still like each other, and we still live 2000 miles apart. lol Things are pretty much in a holding pattern until he moves here in late January. He has been super duper preoccupied lately but still finds time to talk to me, which I like. The one thing I will say is we both seem to be approaching this from the same mind-set. And by that I just mean, neither he or I is looking to get into a LTR just so we can be in an LTR.  Ugh, that is so 90’s. Anyway, it just is. We aren’t pressuring it or trying to make it anything other than it is. It might sound weird but that’s oddly comforting to me. He is coming up for Christmas so I got it off so we could have a long weekend together. I’m looking forward to it.

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The bike shop where I take my beast called me out of the blue today and they got the remaining parts for my bike in. Even better, they surprised me. I scratched up the crank cover pretty severe the last time I low-sided the bike. The shop ordered me a new more stylish one with a slider built over it to prevent future gashes in the event I slide the bike again. Well, they didn’t tell me the slide plate was solid blue like my bike. Of course I was ecstatic! They know blue is my signature color and know me well enough to know I would have totally jumped on it had I known. Yeah, it was 50 bucks extra but so what. I “gottsta” look good damn it! LOL  Anyhoo, they popped all the new parts on today and the bike is good as new.

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Its effin’ cold here right now. And I do mean cold. It got down to 34 last night and tonight its a balmy 41 degrees out. That’s pretty cold for SF. It almost never gets below the high 40’s/low 50’s. Of course, being a windy ocean-side city makes it even worse. We actually got tiny hail for 5 whole minutes earlier this week. Seriously, it hailed/snowed for like 5 minutes in SF. [3]Global warming is a total myth right? lol 

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Work is work. I did rotate back to PD side about a month ago.  I’ve been on fire side for a 18 months and I decided it was time to rotate back. I gotta admit, while it is way busier, I missed it. We started our shift sign-up last week. There is a very real chance I’ll get bumped back onto a 4-10 shift. I’m hoping not but it is beyond my control so I’ll deal with it. I’m pretty sure of getting some sort of weekend slot regardless but I’d love to stay on 5′-8s. I’ll know in about a week. I’ve reached a point where my seniority isn’t changing much. For years, I jumped 10-15 slots every sign-up. I’ve been in the mid 50’s for about 3 years now. I’m not complaining as I can pull the shift I want and can usually pull the days off I want. Truth be told, I’m just grateful to have a job. Things are still very rough on the City’s budget crisis. They are still threatening to layoff staff (that we don’t have) and/or just reduce our ability to backfill overtime. That means if someone goes on vacation or calls in sick, they department can’t call people in on overtime to meet minimum numbers. That means when you call 911 you sit in queue longer. I’m disgusted at the possibilities but its out of my hands so I’m hoping for reason.

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I think the ambien is actually taking hold so time to shut my pie-hole. That or I have gas, either way its time to go.

References

References
↑1 well, weirder than normal.
↑2 oh I’m sure they are just hanging on my every word…don’t judge me.
↑3 Global warming is a total myth right? lol

Parts

Ugh! I think I’m getting old. [1]well my body is lolol  I’m realizing my 2001 parts aren’t as resilient as they used to be.

No sooner do I get back into a good solid gym routine after recovering from straining my shoulder and I manage to strain the other fracking shoulder! Its not a major injury mind you. I’ll probably have to lay off the heavy weights for only a week or two. I’m more annoyed than injured.

Fortunately, I still have all my original parts and everything still works. (knock on wood)  Truth be told, I’m in pretty good shape. I doubt I’ll ever be as ripped but that’s ok with me. I’ve slowly worked my way up the muscle chain over the years. Here I am a month away from being 39 and I’m 5 lbs [2]naked, true body weight is done in the buff bitches shy of breaking 200 lbs! And from someone who used to weigh 90 lbs soaking wet, that’s a big deal! Of course, some of that is fat weight but the ratio is very healthy and let’s face it, I like to eat. lol  And while such a goal could be accomplished in a shorter time frame, being healthy has always been my primary focus. The purdy muscles are just an added benefit.

Anyway, I’ve always wanted to hit 210lbs. I’m sure I’ll eventually hit it but patience has never been one of my better virtues. lol I’m actually looking at combining resistance and interval training together. Last time I did that, I really noticed a difference. Of course, that is AFTER the shoulder is all better again.

References

References
↑1 well my body is
↑2 naked, true body weight is done in the buff bitches

Remembering

I’m not sure why but I had a dream about my father last night. He would have been 73 years old this month were he alive. November was his birth month. Funny, I used to never remember his birthday while he was alive. I’m curious why I remember it now like clockwork. Is it because we were finally able to have some sort of peace together towards the end? I’m not sure to be honest.

The dream itself wasn’t overly significant. It was just odd that my father kept coming into the picture. And to be fair, it was a nice dream. No drama, no bad stuff, no painful memories. That is a good thing because I don’t have many good memories of my father. The few good years have been overshadowed by the painful years after my step-mother came along.

Ironically, I find as the years pass I miss my father more and more. I don’t really understand that either. We were never closer after my teen years, for obvious reasons. I still carry the emotional (and physical) scars of his impact on my life. My younger brother doesn’t understand as he was simply too young, but I know my older brother does. He and I got the full brunt of my father’s wrath on many many MANY occasions.

Anyway, back to the point of my little ramble. As much as I tried to shake the memories, they’ve stuck with me today. Maybe dad was looking in on me and this was his way of letting me know. While never a very religious man, my father did believe in the “here-after”, as he called it. My father also believed in other-worldly things like ghosts. There were several episodes in my early childhood where my father surprised me with his compassion and comfort when I needed it.

One time in particular, I was being haunted [1]yes, I said haunted and I truly mean it in the literal sense by an apparition for several months. Looking back on it, I think I was on the verge of losing my sanity. This was not a passing nightmare or dream fantasy. It was as tangible and real as the keyboard I’m typing on now. It plagued me night after night for months. It would wake me from a sound sleep, I’d be freezing, and I would clearly see it watching me. My only rational response at the time was blood-curling screams and hurling my body full-force into bed with my father on a nightly basis.

Of course, never missing an opportunity to ridicule me, my step-mother taunted me with names and verbal abuse. She even had the audacity to suggest it was my dead foster mother come back for revenge. Toward the end though, I think even she relented a little. As hard as she tried, her belligerent threats and bullying weren’t enough to overcome my fear. That and one night she decided to ‘show me’ and slept in my bed. The next morning she was unusually quite and never slept in my bed again. She never did explain to me or dad, what she saw/felt, if anything. But after that, I do remember she was less mean to me. She even did little nice things for me, which was totally out of character for her.

After one dreadfully painful night spent screaming and throwing everything I could get my grubby little hands on, my father sat me down the next day to comfort me. It is one of the few times in my entire childhood I can remember my father holding me. He also gave me some advice on how he would handle it. I was doe-eyed because he didn’t ridicule me, he didn’t talk down to me, he was speaking to me as if we were equals. Even if he didn’t believe me per se, he could see the very real fear in my eyes. [2]And after 3 months of almost nightly attacks, I think he might have been a little desperate as well. When I didn’t sleep, neither did anyone else!  That and I think he too might have realized my little id was fast reaching a breaking point. And his advice worked! Whether it was my confidence to overcome said entity by denying it the energy it needed or whatever, it worked. It was also the first time in my life I faced something on my own. I think much of self-confidence today stems from that one episode.

Ok, so back on topic. I miss my father. It comforts me to know I am holding onto the good parts of my life with him. And Dad, if you are out there sending me a message. I got it, loud and clear. I haven’t forgotten you.

References

References
↑1 yes, I said haunted and I truly mean it in the literal sense
↑2 And after 3 months of almost nightly attacks, I think he might have been a little desperate as well. When I didn’t sleep, neither did anyone else!

Blues

Summer is over and the cool weather is definitely setting in here in SF. While it rarely gets cold cold here, I did have to turn on the heater for the first time this past weekend. brrr! This coming weekend looks to be chilly as well.

Sadly, that also means less moto rides. I did get a ride in this past weekend even though it was chilly. I don’t like riding in the cold, but since I haven’t had much time lately I wanted to get a ride in. It was fun, as always. I’m sure we will get a few warm weekends sprinkled throughout the winter season. That said, I’m already missing the weekly rides.

In less depressing news, Apple guy got his bike this week. He made out like a bandit and scored a really nice bike off ebay for a steal! As luck would have it, its a GSXR like mine (but a 600 mind you :p). Its a sweet looking bike and he is already planning a slew of tweaks and customizations for it. I thought I was bad, he has me beat hands down. Lol. Of course, I have picked up some nice ideas from him. I think his creative streak is much larger than mine. [1]That or I’m just lazy. Anyway, he picks it up this week. I think I’m more excited than he is.  lol

References

References
↑1 That or I’m just lazy.

P-you

Why is it my fellow homo’s feel the need to bathe in cologne? I mean, come on!

I ran into a friend in the hood the other day, we exchanged hello’s and a customary hug before going our separate ways. I was immediately bombarded by his overpowering cologne. I was almost nauseous it was so strong, no exaggeration. I got thru it and went on about my day.

An hour later, I’m in Bearbucks getting some much needed caffeine and the guy behind the counter commented on how nice my cologne smelled! Before he said anything, I had just chalked the lingering smell up to my poor nose being overwhelmed. Oh noooo, I got home and took my shirt off and I could smell the shit all over my damn shirt! Now imagine how much he must have had on for it to rub off all over my shirt!

I don’t personally wear cologne very often but I also don’t really mind it, when used properly. I have a strong sense of smell (and as we all know, taste is tied into smell). I also happen to prefer the natural clean scent of human skin over cologne. [1]And no, I don’t like stank either. That is just as gross and not at all healthy. When used properly, cologne can enhance your own natural smell and be alluring.

So here is a clue for all you cologne-lovers out there. Its meant to give a hint of fragrance. It is not meant to overpower someone’s olfactory system completely. Oh and don’t even get me started on guys who bathe/shower, shave, deodorant, and cologne with the exact same fragrance. OMFG!

Let me be the first to be a true friend and tell you you don’t smell pretty at all. You stink! A drop behind each ear and maybe a drop on each wrist is more than enough. If that isn’t enough, your cologne is too cheap and should be avoided all together. [2]The whole line of AXE shite is a prime example of product(s) to be avoided at all costs. If all of your hygiene products have the same fragrance, you don’t need any cologne at all. And if you can’t afford the really good stuff just go for the natural clean smell. I guarantee everyone around you will be grateful.

/rant

References

References
↑1 And no, I don’t like stank either. That is just as gross and not at all healthy.
↑2 The whole line of AXE shite is a prime example of product(s) to be avoided at all costs.

Unsettled

Work has been an absolute torment for me this week. Not my job per se (that I can handle) but stuff influencing not only my day to day operations but my position as a Steward as well. I had enough foresight to see this problem coming months ago and made several attempts to prevent it from happening. Obviously, that didn’t happen.

Without going into details and bad-mouthing a whole slew of people who aren’t here to defend themselves, I basically felt pressured into making a very big deal out of something I feel could have been handled with only a tiny amount of intervention. It is a very big deal to me. The irony is because I’m so incredibly frustrated and angry, I’ve lost my normal sense of composure and ability to make shrewd calculated responses. I pride myself on being able to see the big picture, step back from a situation, size it up, respond accordingly, and work to a successful resolution. That said, realizing I’d lost this detachedness, I called in my big rep for our Union. I felt a little ashamed to bother him with it but he backed me up 110%.

To give you an idea of how out of sorts I am. This new issue has me so wound up and angry not only did I loose my temper yesterday, I actually yelled at several coworkers, which is something I never do. While not making excuse(s), I felt completely isolated and abandoned in the scope of things going on around me at the time. [1]As it turns out, I’m not but it didn’t feel that way.

Today, seeing no one above my rank cared or could even be bothered to feign concern, I escalated the issue to a level that involves myself, the department, and the city in general. This of course angered me even more because it made me feel petty. I absolutely detest being made to feel petty about anything!

Afterwards, needing to blow off steam, I confided in some of my friends at work and was surprised to hear how much they supported my efforts. They not only supported me but encouraged me to carry my fight to the very end. Its funny how just a little nod of approval can give one a sense of validation and conviction.

And while it may still come across as petty to some, I am feeling much more my old self again and am confident it will get resolved to my satisfaction.

References

References
↑1 As it turns out, I’m not but it didn’t feel that way.

6Dollar Patience

Sometimes patience is NOT a virtue. Since I can’t sleep at the moment I thought I’d go on a little corporate bitch-fest.

Knowing I love t-shirts, one of my twitter buddies referred me to a site that specializes in cheap but unique shirts. Sounds good right? I hopped over to 6dollarshirts.com and true enough they offered a great selection of not so common t-shirts at a great price. [1]Actually, the shirts were so cheap, the shipping was more than the shirt.

I found a shirt I liked and placed my order. Got a confirmation the very next day that my ‘order had been processed’. I’m like, ‘damn skippy, that was fast’.  I then proceed to wait, wait, and then wait some more. After 2 weeks I sent a short request for an update and got this vague reply.

Hello,

6DollarShirts customer service is extremely backed up right now due to staffing issues. We are working our hardest to answer emails as quickly as possible. In the meantime, we ask for your patience until we get this resolved. We are printing shirts overtime right now and orders are shipping a few days behind schedule . If the matter is extremely urgent, please call us at 352.371.6536.

Thank You,

6DollarShirts.com

My first annoyance, this was clearly a canned response which had no real connection to my order/request. Then I remembered my order was supposed to have already been processed. Now, not only am I feeling annoyed but lied to as well. Needless to say, I was not pleased. Needing to vent, I made a quick bitchy-blurb on twitter. To my surprise, I got a follow up comment thru twitter from the company. I’m thinking, ‘ok, maybe they really are trying’. Lo and behold I find an email in my inbox the very next morning with confirmation of shipment (again).

At this point, I’m somewhat mollified thinking my order is on the way. Sadly, I go on to wait, wait, and wait some more, yet again. I send a 2nd follow up email, to which I got no reply at all. Finally today, a full month to the day, I got my order in the mail. To be fair, the shirt (left) was designed as promised and was overall the product I ordered.

Any excitement I had over getting the item was completely overshadowed by the underhanded business practice used to get a quick sale on a product. Not only that, they made no real attempt to help me as a customer, no apology, no expedited shipping, nothing. No surprise, I doubt I’ll ever spend money on said company again, regardless of how cheap their shirts are.

On a related note, it seems this practice is becoming more and more common every day. There is virtually no concern for real customer service anymore at all. Basically, greed has taken over and everything else is secondary to most companies.

Here’s a clue to all you up and coming ‘entrepreneurs’ out there. People actually don’t mind paying a reasonable price for quality AND service. I’d even argue most people would be willing to pay a little more for exceptional levels of both.

Lesson learned. I guess you really do get what you pay for.

/rant

References

References
↑1 Actually, the shirts were so cheap, the shipping was more than the shirt.

It Happened

Well, it finally happened. I banged my bike up a bit yesterday. Now, before you freak out, it was minor and I am fine, albeit a few scratches. Totally my fault this time. I went out on a late ride with my buddy Mark and we’d just left lunch at Alice’s. We were taking one of my favorite routes, Hwy 84 across to Hwy 1. It has a ton of different types of curves.

As usual I was spending too much time making sure the person behind me was keeping up and less attention on the road. I have an awful habit of doing that. Lesson learned.  Anyway, I came around a curve a little out of balance. [1]The irony here was my buddy had just finished bragging about how well I handle curves.  I figured since I was already going wide I’d just pull off onto the large shoulder. I assumed from the look that it was pavement. I was wrong! lol  Turned out it was very soft gravel.

Since I was already coming out of a the curve the bike was moving too fast when I hit the gravel.  Still having a bit of momentum from the turn, I knew as soon as I hit the gravel I was gonna loose it. Sure enough, the bike fishtailed and down on its side it (and I) went! The gravel was slippery but it was also soft, which turned out to be a good thing. I slid for about 20-30 yards before coming to a stop just shy of a guard rail. (Now that would have hurt!)

The fall/slide/crash was actually quite benign (luckily). I ended up with a few scratches and road rash and that’s it. I had all my gear on, as usual. My riding jacket/pants got all dirtied up but was none worse for wear. I didn’t even bang my helmet!

As you can see from the pics, my bike suffered some damage. Thankfully, I have sliders and the left one took the full brunt of the spill. It will need to be replaced as its bent now. I also broke the left foot-peg (below) completely off and scratched part of the engine casing. I’ll probably leave the casing for now but will eventually replace it. I don’t like it looking all banged up. That was about it! I was really (pleasantly) surprised at the lack of damage to my baby.

We spent some time looking over the bike before taking off again. All looked to be in good working order other than the foot-peg. I decided I’d just bend my leg back and up and prop it on the passenger peg. It worked like a charm. [2]Other than forcing me to lean way over on the tank and constantly push my balls into the tank. Thankfully, they were still in tack after the 40 miles home.  There was one more surprise in store for me though. About 3 miles further on, the gear-shifter peg fell off. (The blue lever in the below image) They are made to break to prevent the frame from being damaged so it wasn’t surprising. However, this created a unique problem because I had no real way to shift gears now. The lever was still there and working fine but the little peg I catch my foot on was gone.

I originally decided to just start the bike in 3rd gear. This would have reduced the need to keep switching back and forth.  It takes some timing to get the bike to take off in 3rd but it worked. Knowing I couldn’t ride all the way home in 3rd gear, I practiced using just the lever with my foot.  After about 10-15 miles, I started getting the hang of it. I had to look but I was basically just sliding my foot high and tight under/over the lever to shift. I still had to look down for most of the trip but I managed and made it home w/o any other incidents.

The down side is my moto shop is closed on Monday’s so I have to wait till Tuesday to take it in to get the foot-peg and shifter replaced. I’ll get generic ones until they get some more of the shiny blue ones (that I just bought 3 months ago).

References

References
↑1 The irony here was my buddy had just finished bragging about how well I handle curves.
↑2 Other than forcing me to lean way over on the tank and constantly push my balls into the tank. Thankfully, they were still in tack after the 40 miles home.

Photo Op

Thank you to everyone for the kind words on the pic. I do clean up nicely, if I don’t say so myself. *g*

On a side note, the suit pictured in the last post was so tight if I had thrown my arms up in the air I’d have ripped out the armpits. I’m not joking, that bad boy was tight! Apparently, yours truly has developed some girth in his upper body since moving SF. [1]Ironically, the pants fit just fine.

Don’t even get me started on taking the jacket on and off either. I kept it on thru most of the ceremony as I was afraid of looking like a dork trying to get it back on. Of course, there was a meal along with the reception. I finally had to break down and take it off as I was afraid I’d be popping buttons in my plate.

Seriously though, I’m a little irritated as I’ll have to replace the damn thing at some point. Which sucks because I kept the newest suit out of the bunch when I gave all my other ones away. [2]I used to have to wear suits in my old job back home in TX. I’m tempted not to even bother. It might just be cheaper and easier to rent one for the next snazzy event.

What about you? Buy or rent?

References

References
↑1 Ironically, the pants fit just fine.
↑2 I used to have to wear suits in my old job back home in TX.