Category: humor

Tag! You’re It II

While blogrolling, I discovered I’d been tagged again. This time by Steve over at Bent Collective. Not being a meme whore, I don’t do these very often. (I think someone else tagged me for another one but I can’t find it at the moment…apologies)

So w/o further “cradoo”, I present the Meme of 4.

4 JOBS I HAVE HAD IN MY LIFE

– I’ve had many but trying to pick the odd ones.

– a bath house clerk

– catering manager for a hotel

– police/fire/ems dispatcher

– EMT – ok, I’m still working on this one but it’s coming very soon!

Continue reading Tag! You’re It II

Only in SF II

I’m taking a break from studies. My hematomas’ are blending w/my hemothoraxes and we just can’t have that. I’d thought I’d share some funny tidbits encountered today.

Only in SF will you see:

… a gurl and girl exchanging makeup tips and discussing the cheapest places to buy MAC.

… a leather daddy, decked out in full leather, getting his nails done side by side w/Katy Sue, Surban Mom Extraordinaire AND they are having a conversation. (I couldn’t help but laugh.)

… a straight man giving a gay man tips on where to buy the best boots.

… a hardware store that sells lube.

… a guy wearing leather pants to the gym.

Not sure if that makes us a ‘gay mecca’ but it’s nice to know it exists.

I know I shouldn’t but I can’t help myself. I’ve noticed “Zig Zag” the new coffee/tea shop they put in place of Le BonGateaux isn’t doing so well. (Superstar, the video store next door bought it.) It’s been open almost 3 full weeks now and I’ve yet to see more than a few people inside at any given time. I know I shouldn’t make fun but I can’t help it. They took a wonderfully comfortable coffee shop and turned it into this empty (think “less is more”) cold space w/tacky colors and straight lines everywhere. What were they thinking? This isn’t Sunset Blvd, it’s the Castro. The only thing w/straight lines are the Dykes at Cliff’s Hardware!

Ok, enough venting. Back to my studies. I’m only up to H so far.

Only in SF

Trying to put myself in a better mood, I thoughd I’d share a funny occurence overheard on the subway this morning between two trannys.

Tranny1: Rambling about men and a breakup

Tranny2: don’t you know it.

Tranny1: I need a man!

Tranny2: No gurl! What you NEED is therapy!

It was a sorta ‘had to be there’ moment however, it was pure comedy when the little ancient looking asian lady sitting next to them burst out laughing and added “Oh Girls, it’s the men that need therapy!”

I laughed all the way home.

Failure

I HAD to share this. I’m on a joke list from a friend back home. I routinely delete a lot of his emails but today’s had me rolling on the floor.

It is simple. Do a google search for the word “failure” and look at the first result!

Meme Me This…

So Large Tony‘s got me doing a Meme. (course that boy could convince me to do just about anything.)

The rules are simple.

1. If you want to participate, leave a comment below saying “Interview me.”
2. I will respond by asking you five questions – each person’s will be different. I’ll post the questions in the comments section of this post.
3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview others in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

Here goes.

1. What is the most embarrassing thing that ever happened to you in grade school?
That’s easy. Fifth grade, I had Miss Hanchey as my teacher. On the outside she was a mean spiteful wench. On the inside, she was a sweet old lady who loved kids. So one day after grammar studdies, I’m goofing off (I was a holy terror in grade school) leaning way back in my chair, holding myself upright by my feet under my desk. I inadvertently farted and it was a loud one. Not only that but the chair seat was plastic so it reverberated even louder. The whole room burst out laughing. I was so startled I lost my footing and fell straight back. Two whammies for the price of one!

2. Name something that you really wish you were better at.
Sucking cock. No, just kidding, I am an expert at that already. Uh…um…I always wished I could sing. My child hood fantasy was to be a singer. The first time I heard my recorded voice played back I was heartbroken to discover I couldn’t carry a note if my life depended on it.

3. What specific item in your closet/wardrobe would you wear to definitely get a man’s attention?
This is a toughy. I can dress to impress but I am very much a T-shirt and jeans kinda guy. I’d have to say a nice snug pair of pants to show off my backside. Guys usually notice my eyes and my butt first anyway. If you got it, flaunt it!

4. What would your friends be surprised to find in the trunk or glove box of your car?
Well I currently own a motor scooter so that would be kinda hard. (I sold my car upon moving to SF) But back when I had a car, I’d have to say a taser. I kept a taser in my glovebox for years.

5. M&M’s or Skittles?
Defintely M&M’s. I’m not a big candy person. The only other candy I find irresistible is Reece’s Peanut Butter Cups.

Tag your it!