A Past Not Forgotten

Today marks the 1 year anniversary of my father’s death. For those of you long term readers, you know that his passing while sad was not overly traumatic for me. It did bring up many unresolved issues for me. Some of which I was able to resolve at the time. My father and I weren’t close considering our history. However, in the end, we did reach a sort of understanding and mutual respect for each other. One might even say love.

I look back today not w/sadness or regret. Nothing that was done can be undone. And while at times, I still resent the unnecessary hardships inflicted upon me by my family, I am grateful as well. Those hardships have helped mold me into the person I am today. Humility really is a good teacher. I never understood that as I child. As an adult, it is all too clear.

In slightly less depressing news, today is my Friday. I was only moderately bad last night. Home and in bed by 3:00am. This moring, I had a conversation w/someone which left me in very good spirits.

5 thoughts on “A Past Not Forgotten”

  1. I kept clicking the links and what I read kept getting worse. I am truely sorry you grew up with such shit. Please remember all of this has helped make you the person you are today. You have accomplished a lot and gone far.

  2. Moby….

    You”ve managed your life remarkably. YOU nailed it in your last paragraph. And you know, the person you have become shines in your face, seriously. I am glad you found some peace and forgave your father. Something in his life went ary if there was a connection with you until around 7-8 yrs. Perhaps he never expressed it verbally to you but chose to take his hidden anger out on you. Perhaps, he, like you, missed his first wife, your foster mother, more than you know. I don’t know the dynamics your family faced but it’s just a thought. I think back to my point…you made that proper and ‘adult’ choice to forgive.

    If I might throw in one other thought…if you constantly assess your daily life based on honesty, humility, integrity, you’ll find that you will grow more as an individual and live happier. Your personal growth will only serve to reap more fruits. Something I try to commit too daily, not always with sucess, but I try.

  3. Damn—-isn’t it a laugh that a simple question like Miracle Whip vs Mayo and Creamy vs Crunchy PB could drum up so many comments. Perhaps the ol’ addage, ‘if you want to get to a man (or is that ‘get a man’), feed his belly” has a ring of truth to it!!!!

    Just had that comment in Moby.

  4. This is kind of creepy, but our Dads died just days apart. I mean if there was something like the Pearly Gates, they’d probably be in line together wondering where all the “fundies” were.

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