This is my retired coworker and dear friend Bob pictured with Shawn and myself. We worked together for many years before his retirement and we’ve become closer friends since then. He is 83! (I should hope to live so long and still be mobile under my own steam!) He lives in Castro Valley which is about 30 mins out of SF. I get up once a month or so or he gets down here to hang out in the ‘hood.
Due to his age, I’ve also stepped into a role as his extended caregiver. I’m happy to be there to help him out when and where I can. I’ve talked my whole life about the lack of role models for gen X’ers like myself growing up gay. Well, here I am grown up and I can be that role model…I hope. At least I try to be.
Not being close to most of my family, the elders of which are deceased anyway, I’ve never had this sort of care role. I’m honored he trusts me enough to lean on for support. He sometimes worries he is a burden and that couldn’t be further from the truth.
Well, as I sit here typing this I am remembering maybe this isn’t my first care role. 😂 When my younger brother was coming up, I ended up caring for him a lot due to his mom’s pill addiction. Later, after getting kicked out of home for being a big homo, I spent roughly 2 years caring for my elderly grandmother. So maybe I should rephrase to say, “this is my first care role as an adult!”
Regardless, I’m happy to do it. He is my friend and having outlived most of his own family I know he needs my help. At the end of the day, that’s all that really matters.