Tonight, I had a mini epiphany. You could say proof of an insecurity I’ve grown out of.
I had a rather odd first meeting with a couple of guys from bear411. I’d chatted with this guy off and on over a few months and we’d seemed to have nice online connection. He lives down in LA. He texted me online tonight to say he was in town with a friend visiting before heading up to the river tomorrow. I didn’t really wanna go out but certainly didn’t wanna be rude so I made the effort.
Skipping for a moment, he appeared more than a few years older in person, it didn’t go well. It didn’t go bad either. It just sorta went. He was nice enough. There was just no chemistry, no sparks, nothing. Not even a real connection. I also got the distinct impression he and his friend had nothing but disdain for SF as well as a little internalized homophobia. No judgments just an observation.
The point is in the past this would have bothered me. I used to obsess about someone liking me. I used to incorrectly assume if there wasn’t some sort of spark that something must be wrong w/me. This time I had no such feelings. I just didn’t really care. They were nice, there was just no connection and that was ok. I wasn’t upset or distraught or even perturbed. I was polite, talkative, and even offered to go grab a bite to eat. I guess I really am growing up. Who knew?
Awwww….our little Moby is growing up (dabbing tears from the corner of eyes).
Have a wonderful holiday, big guy!
There are six billion people on the planet, one person not liking you is 1.6×10^-10 %. Definitely not anything to get worried about.
It means that you are confident about who you are and what you want. You cannot please everybody just like everything else in the world. Hope that you have a nice happy 4th holiday!
wait a minute…Are you telling me they were from LA and they’re dissing SF?
oh.
my.
god.
That’s delusion of the most dire sort. And I can say that because I’ve lived in both places.
I bet I know them.
Good riddance to psychotic baggage I say!